ms fish

Enough is Enough

2012-02-12T20:17:00.001-07:00

One day I thought, I’ve a problem to face…

a serious issue of having no space.

When and how did all this stuff creep

into our house while we’ve all been asleep?

I admit I’ve helped this predicament some.

For when there’s a sale, you can bet I will come.

For example, there’s the school supply sale in theFall

with the pencils and markers and staplers and all.

Notebooks are always on sale for a dime.

It’s too hard to resist. I buysixty nine!

No matter if the item is something I need

If it’s a good deal, I feel justified indeed.

Besides all the bargains, I don’t throw away.

You just never know, I mayneed it someday.

It’s not in my nature to toss out in haste.

I don’t like to see anything going to waste.

You say you are taking a load to D.I.?

Could I take a look, and give YOUR stuff a try?

You’re tossing a bike from the Civil War days?

I’ll take it. I mayneed a ‘vintage’display.

Our corners and closets and each little nook,

are teeming with gadgets and gizmos and books.

We have quilts and old clothes and folders and files,

chipped china from grandma and yarn stretchingmiles.

The storage shed (which formerly was a garage)

is packed with stacks of old boxesto dodge.

They’re sheltered inside from the weather and dust,

while our costly vehicles sit outside and rust.

Maybe I just shouldn’t make such a fuss.

Theproblem is though, there’s no room for US!

December Calendars

2011-12-02T12:29:00.001-07:00

I have been using these desktop calendars from Smashing Magazine for about a year. I'm always excited to see what new designs the artists offer each month. December is no exception. There are some beautiful designs. And the best part: they are FREE to download. Check it out and see if one suits your fancy.

Pics for Pinterest

2011-11-14T20:12:00.000-07:00

I Don't Wear Green Very Well

2011-11-07T07:00:00.000-07:00

The Beattles sing "Can't Buy me Love."

But what do they know? The wanted everyone to live in a yellow submarine.

The fact is, you can buy love. Money can buy a lot of things: happiness, power, prestige, position, friendship, leadership, and yes, it can even buy a family. There is almost nothing that money can't buy.

Except....

EXPERIENCE and WISDOM

E&W are immune to the tinkle of coins, and can only be purchased with the commodity of TIME. Experience cannot be transferred from person to person. It must be self-acquired. That is what makes experience, and the resulting wisdom, so valuable.

But sometimes I sure wish there were shortcuts, or little secret tricks on how to gain experience faster. Wouldn't it be great if Groupon had killer 2 for 1 specials every so often? Two year's worth of experience for 1 year's worth of work.

I could go for that.

Dying To Have A Party

2011-10-26T18:42:00.000-06:00

I've always said I wanted my funeral to be a big party. With music and hoopla and food - good food! And as long as I'm putting in my order, I'd like to be there and have this happen before I'm stiff in a coffin (gives a whole new meaning to the phrase 'outside the box').

It just so happens that last Friday I got my wish, when a few of my friends and I gathered for a funeral -- my funeral.

Even though rigor mortis is starting to set in, here I am writing about it. (Elvis and I are probably the only ones who have blogged about our own funerals. I imagine the Ellen show will be calling any day).

This all came about because I got a job. I realized right away my freedom would be laid to rest. So a funeral was planned and invitations sent to my nurse practitioner friends (the group that could best commiserate).

Invitation

During the funeral, we reminisced about the good old days. Remember when I sat poolside, or could go to a high school assembly in the middle of the day, or trample off to Salt Lake City for a concert at a moment's notice?

Now, after three years of jobless liberation, I am buried by the chains of employment. The death of my freedom is a difficult loss.

My BFF Missy helped ease the pain with a 2 lb gift of See's chocolates....

and a prescription....

There was the obligatory funeral program.

funeral program - place setting

Of course, we ate. The weather was absolutely perfect for eating outside. Warm fall evenings are the pay-off for living in Southern Utah. And fine food always soothes my sagging soul.

Menu

Julienned beets with blue cheese

Funeral potatoes

Grilled broccoli

Pork tenderloin with sweet balsamic glaze

Artisan bread

Caramel apple cheesecake

Sunset spritzers

I didn't take any pics of our food (I was busy dying afterall). But here are pics from around the blogosphere of the recipes I made.

In case you were wondering...the funeral potatoes were homemade with no canned soup or frozen potatoes. This takes funeral potatoes to a whole new level. The Celestial level.

And the cheesecake.... oh the cheesecake....trust me when I say you should make this for your funeral. It tasted like little cherubic chunks of cosmic glory. And reminds you that there are living angels in this world, like Granny Smith.

It was like I had died and gone to heaven!

photo credit

Let's Hear It For The Boys (title in honor of Footloose release)

2011-10-17T17:15:00.000-06:00

I don't brag much (except for when I brag about not bragging very much).

I usually keep quiet about my kids' scholarships, accolades, awards and achievements.

But some things have happened recently that have proven irresistible for me to keep quiet about. Because out of everything my children have done, these things rank right up there as making me the MOST proud.

First
My daughter Daisy and I were at a wedding reception. We were visiting with a lady and in the middle of our conversation, she looked up at Daisy and said, "I want you to marry my grandson." Daisy gets requests like that fairly often. And nothing warms my heart more than having someone give the ultimate endorsement by wanting my daughter to be part of their family.

Second
I received this Facebook message today from a mother in our community.

Jenni,
I love to hear good things kids do, so I thought you might like this. Today at the store your boys came up to me as I got to the car (lunch hour) and said hi and asked if I needed help with groceries! I said sure, but then "well I don't know what you can do - I am sort of stuck here" (no room to have them do anything from where I was parked). "Well, we can give moral support" was the response. They also congratulated me on Summer getting a scholarship and were so sincere. What cool kids. I know a lot of teens, and not many will approach an adult on their own. It was a small thing - a congrats and offer to help - but I was super impressed. Thanks for raising good kids!

Thanks to JBS for taking time to write me that note. Sharing those moments mean so much to parents. As it certainly did to me.

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Well... as long as I'm on the subject, here is another thing

On Saturday evening, Possum, Otto and Andy, and I came home from being in Salt Lake. We walked into a spotless house. Even the front porch had been hosed off.

"Wow...what is the occasion?" I asked my dear darling daughter Daisy.

"I wanted you to start work with a clean house" Daisy replied (referring to my new job starting today after a three-year hiatus). Then this morning she left a note for me on the front door wishing me luck on my first day of work. She's like a dream mom. To her mom.

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Ok.... now I'm on a roll

A few weeks ago, Andy woke up with a terrible pain in his calf. Watching him limp around the house, I asked, "why do you think you are cramping? Are you getting enough electrolytes?"

"I don't know. I haven't been drinking any milk," Andy, the gallon-a-day-milk-drinker said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Oh... just cuz" he replied in typical teen-age talk.

"Why haven't you been drinking milk?" I pushed.

"Cuz it's expensive." Andy hesitantly mumbled.

Tears welled up as I realized Andy was not drinking milk because my husband lost his job.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok...one more thing, because I just got an exciting phone call...hot off the press

TODAY, my oldest son got a job at the MTC. That isn't easy to do. It requires a multi-step process of interviews, teaching, and presentations. Lots of applicants. Few are hired.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My buttons are bursting.

I don't even know what to say. I'm speechless. I'm writing-less.

(see what I mean? blank space here....)

I am grateful. I am proud. I am blessed. That's all.

YASGILY Fab Four. YASGILY!!!

A Recent Experience on Craig's List (aka Tanner Butler Saves the Day)

2011-10-03T15:43:00.002-06:00

I recently listed my daughter's wedding dress for sale on Craig's List. What follows is an exchange with a [potential] customer.

	from	Karly Naylor naylorly04@gmail.com via craigslist.org
to		sale-fj9vs-2618568190@craigslist.org
date		Mon, Sep 26, 2011 at 4:30 PM
subject		BRAND NEW Custom-made Short Wedding Dress - $450 (Hurricane)
mailed-by		craigslist.org

Hello there,

Just saw your ad on craigslist. I really like this dress,its good looking. Could I possibly get more pics of it?

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On Thur, Se 29, 2011 at 1:13 pm, my Reply:

Karly,

Sorry I am slow in getting back to you. I was trying to pin down my busy daughter to take pictures of her in the dress so you can see it on a person. If you are still interested... we can send those later today.

Thanks.

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On Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 2:29 PM, Karly Naylor wrote:

Hello,

Thanks for your response. I would love to buy it,i`ll like to have the wedding dress alone. This is my first thing am buying off craigslist.org

I really want to come see it and try it on but i cannot as i am out of town due to work and preparation for my wedding. I think i have seen enough pictures so far so i would love to buy it off from you as will be relying on your judgment.

My method of payment would be through a Certified Check since am not around and can not remit cash from here as this is coming impromptu. Please let me know the final asking price so i can make arrangements as i will handle the shipment myself and i will be sending my mover down to pick up the dress at your place.

Kindly provide me with your full name and mailing address to which the Certified check would be sent so we can wrap this up real quick as the wedding is just around the corner.
NB: I also want to inform you that there will be an excess amount of funds which you will forward to my mover (for shipment purposes).

Karly.

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On Mon, Oct 3 at 11:15 am, my REPLY:

KarLY,
Okay sounds good. You have a deal!

I am excited and think you will LOVE this dress. Since you are relying on my judgment (smart move), I think that even though you are buying the dress without trying it on, I'm sure it will fit you perfectly because it is sort of a magic dress. it will fit whatever person puts it on (sort of like that movie The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants...have seen it?). Also, since your wedding is just around the corner, and you waited until the last minute to find a dress, I am so happy you found something in the nick of time. I can imagine your relief! That is just fine to have your mover pick up the dress. It sounds like you are a pretty special customer to have such an accommodating mover. Please tell them thanks... that will really save me time from having to package it.

Here are just a couple more things to get this transaction taken care of:
1. I have had to raise the price to $750 since I listed it on Craig's List because I failed to account for the magic properties.
2. I will not be giving you or your movers or any of your other accomplices cash back.
3. I will be reporting you for fraud.

If you are still interested, let me know.
Thanks.

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Dang dumb dishonest people.

Thank heavens I had just attended my friend's important Eagle Project. Tanner Butler, an awesome local high school student, organized a community fair on protecting citizens from fraud. We heard about the latest scams from bankers and cops.

Jeff, the bank manager, told me about a popular scheme where buyers from sites like Craig's List and Ebay will pay with a check written out for more than the purchase and request cash back. In a few days, the bank (where the seller cashed the check) will demand full re-payment, because the check won't clear.

Remember the mantra Caveat Emptor: Let the Buyer Beware. Now remember my new mantra:

Seller's Be Savvy

Thank you Tanner Butler!!

Remodeled

2011-09-19T07:00:00.000-06:00

Once upon a time, clear back before the haze of summer days was even on the horizon, I attended a little something 5 years in the making called Nursing Convocation.

Six weeks prior, I received an email stating I had been recommended by the faculty to submit a possible graduation speech. 20 [something] students were extended this invitation. From the written submissions, faculty would narrow those choices down to 8 individuals. Those 8 would give their speech live to a panel of "judges" after which two students would be chosen to speak at graduation. (I can't believe I actually used the phrase after which in a sentence!! Who does that??)

I was flattered by the email, but didn't want to do it. Any chance of being chosen would require hours of work and struggle. Writing doesn't come easy for me.... I fret and draw blanks and reword and revise and rehash and rethink and rebuke and rebuff.

No thanks. I wasn't in the mood to gamble with my time.

But my friend Missy said I should do it.

So...I scheduled many secret cuddling sessions with my Mac and crafted a speech. The covert operation would spare me from having to tell everyone when I didn't get chosen.

But this meant I didn't have a single other pair of eyes to proofread or offer opinions about content. My parents, who are always so great to offer feedback, were in China and I didn't want to bother them.

I submitted the speech, then got invited to 'try out" in front of ten bigwigs from the University of Utah. One week after giving the pseudo-speech, I received a phone call from Carrie Radmall. They wanted me and my 3-minute string of words to represent the graduate students at the pulpit.

Next thing I know, I heard myself telling Carrie that I wanted to surprise my parents with this news. "I want them to find out by reading the program right before the ceremony begins."

My good, good parents were coming all the way from China just for my graduation, and I thought it would be fun to give them a little excitement and reward for their journey. I know how proud parents get with these kinds of things....

Carrie said, "this is too big, too exciting. There's no way you can keep it a secret."

What Carrie didn't know is how much I LOVE giving [and getting] surprises!

So, I did it. I didn't tell my parents. I didn't tell my friends or my brothers and sister. I didn't post it on Facebook. (Yes, I did tell my kids and husband and one brother so he could photograph my parent's reaction).

It all played out like I planned. My mom was reading the program before graduation started, saw my name, and squealed the typical squeal she squeals when she deems something squeal-worthy. I was backstage and didn't get to hear / see her reaction, but my sources told me it was exactly what I had hoped for!!

It was an awesome day, especially having all my family there. And I really had fun giving the speech. Especially pumping my fist at the end.... I felt like Richard Simmons in church.

I also had fun being on the stage and watching all the crazy family members cheering for their graduate. Ooops... I mean... watching all the family members cheering crazily for their graduate.

I'd do it again.

An Excuse for Blackberry Cobbler

2011-09-16T18:20:00.000-06:00

It's a female thing.

It comes around once a month...like clockwork.

Sometimes, it sneaks up and catches me by surprise. Other times, I'm better at remembering.

This month I HAD to remember.

This month I was hosting book club.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

photo credit

I've belonged to this book club for two years. I'd like to tell you the name of it, exceptn' we don't have one.

We've tried to come up with a clever descriptive name, but we've been so clever and so descriptive that our mile-high pile of good options have disabled us from reaching a consensus. So we remain named the No-NAME book club.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the host[ess] of the book club last week, I had certain responsibilities: sending email reminders, tidying up the house, leading the discussion, and intervening when two or more people started yelling and throwing their books at one another.

Just kidding. There was no yelling (except when some of us started belting out a Broadway showtune).

There is nothing but love in our book club: love for literature, love for one another, love for snacks, love for spontaneous singing, and love for remaining nameless. Love love all round.

Until last week, that is.........when there was a tiny lack of love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It all started when I decided to do things a little differently.

Usually we choose a THEME (like Africa or feminism) and we all read whatever book we want under the theme's umbrella. Then everyone takes a turn talking about their book.

Most of our club's lovely ladies like it this way. This exposes us to different books and gives everyone ideas for future reads. But I already have a list of books as long as the Snake River that I want to read. So this makes me feel weighted down and even more jipped to hear about all the good books that I don't have time for. Plus, it feels like I'm sitting in school listening to one student book report after another (albeit awesome book reports).

So for my turn, I bagged the theme thing and asked everyone to read the SAME book. Because for some reason, when I read a good book, I want everyone I know to read it too. It's so fun to share that experience. I love to banter about the plot and muse about the themes. I especially love to hear opposing viewpoints and interpretations different than my own.

And I love to talk about the places and people. It fills my mettling cup. Gotta love harmless and guilt-free gossip!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The book I chose was Possession by A.S. Byatt.

It is a cerebral book and required effort. But for me, it was so rewarding. In fact, the more I ponder about the book (and talk about it with my sister-in-law), the more I love it. The concept is like the movie National Treasure, only the treasure was Victorian love letters instead of historical American documents. Byatt did an excellent job weaving two parallel plots in two different time periods. It is a remarkable achievement with incredibly beautiful language. It was so delicious.... like eating a perfectly ripe peach that explodes in your mouth with savor.

But most of my book club didn't think so. Alas, the love was lacking. Several started the book but couldn't make it past Chapter 3....

"too much work"
"not enough action"

Only three of us finished the book and liked it. So, during book club, we talked about Possession a little bit (thanks Kay and Jenny), then others joined in as we broke into our usual rhythm of discussing life and events and other books on our nightstands. We laughed and sang and slurped down pasta salad and blackberry cobbler.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the end of the night, I thought...it's okay that we give book reports. It's okay that we don't have a name. It's okay that not everyone liked my book choice.

It's okay because after everyone drove away, I felt so grateful to rub shoulders with these bright, articulate, fun women.

And I hope they are okay with that too!

Keep reading and celebrating the beauty of differences!
Reed Moore (aka Ms Fish)

How to Welcome Home a Missionary

2011-09-02T00:12:00.008-06:00

I've heard about people who do all kinds of things in the weeks before their missionary comes home... things like remodeling, finishing the basement, moving the garage from the left side to the right side of the house, installing a pool and/or various landscaping tricks-- like spray painting the grass green if the summer heat has siphoned all its color. I've seen the frenzied hair stand on end and the ragged look of exhaustion. I vowed I wouldn't be like those people.

And then I had a missionary of my own coming home.

We didn't want our missionary to come home to the house in the exact condition he left it. Then he would know the truth: that our house was in the exact same condition as when he left it.

Plus there is our mantra: when it's time to spruce, we'll use any excuse.

So... starting about a month before Sean got home, Possum and I were on our own mission to spruce things up and get our home looking like it was going to the prom. After all, our house had a date with a very important person. Just as going to the prom is a passage of growing up, our son had just completed an important rite of passage. He left as a boy and was returning a man. And men notice missing molding and unfinished sheet rock, and the implications of slothfulness behind it.

I decided to document our countdown schedule below, not because I think anyone in their right mind would be interested, but because I want to remember how it all fleshed out. The truth is, it was a glorious time of anticipation and industry. Our family all worked together with a common goal. We accomplished much + the atmosphere in our home was fizzy with love and excitement to see our son/brother again.

FOUR WEEKS BEFORE

The kids and I cleaned out every cupboard, closet and storage room. Side bar -- I LOVE having a clean, organized house, and I love having the looming prospect of house guests and a party to catalyze me into action. Problem is, I obviously don't LOVE it enough to keep it clean all the time. (Or I love doing other things more). I'm already excited to think that my house will be clean again when Otto and Andy come home from their mission in 3 years.
Possum and the boys worked hard on the pool and backyard.
Possum finished the unfinished sheet rock, hung cupboard doors and finished several loose-end projects that have lingered for years.

THREE WEEKS BEFORE

Made a T-shirt quilt for Sean, using shirts from his childhood and school years. This took 5 days and then I turned it over to Karen, my quilting guru. She had the quilt for one week working her magic sewing spirals and curly Q's and wigglywigs.
Possum began scheming and preparing to build an awning over our back porch (more on that in a later post).

T-shirt quilt

TWO WEEKS BEFORE

Began the baking bonanza. Made 3 batches of rolls this week and froze them.
Got jam fever, filling our freezer with 6 batches of jam: strawberry, raspberry, raspberry-blackberry, and strawberry balsamic thyme (ok.. really this has nothing to do with Sean coming home).
Yard pruning and weeding.

ONE WEEK BEFORE

Cleaned the house thoroughly: washing windows, sheets, and all our blankets.
Got Sean's room ready.
Finished up the book / journal I had been keeping for Sean throughout his mission. This consisted of all his letters to us and our letters to him.
Got the quilt back and put on the binding.
Printed and framed some of Sean's missionary photos.
Designed and printed framed words (below)
Made 3 more batches of rolls.
Filled bags of ice each day from the freezer and put them in deep freeze, so I wouldn't have to buy ice.
Andy starts painting the poles for the awning

DAY of ARRIVAL (Saturday, August 15)

Marinated chicken and made potato salad, bread, and chocolate cake for next day's dinner.
Wrapped Sean's quilt.
Everyone helped dust, vacuum, wash windows and doors, mop floors and clean bathrooms.
Otto and Andy washed and folded all the laundry.
Possum swept the front porch, and hosed off the back porch.
Daisy painted a darling poster the size of Toquerville, and risked life and limb to get gigantic balloons filled with helium.

THE MOMENT

Sean's plane was scheduled to arrive at 4:30 pm in St. George. Not that we were anxious or anything, but we left about 2:30 (airport is about a 40 minute drive).

We had a few family and friends at the airport to welcome Sean home.

At 4:30 pm, Daisy got a phone call. It was Sean. He had missed his connecting flight to St. George and was still in SLC. He told us some nice people in the airport had helped him find a connecting flight into Cedar City at 9:00 pm. Now it's crazy that Sean called Daisy, who had a new cell phone and number that Sean didn't know. His acquisition of her # is a Facebook miracle that I should blog about another day :)

Daisy hears from Sean

The original plan was to have our song and dance at the airport and then go out to eat while we were in St. George. Now we went to Plan B. But our stomachs were still holding out for Plan A. So we decided to go celebrate anyway. Sean was back in the West and that was good enough for us!!

After eating Mexican food at La Frontera, we drove home and sat basking in our super clean house....I mean when we sat on the couch, I could have sworn I heard it squeak. We sat. And squeaked. And watched the clock.

FINALLY the hands on the wall gave permission for us to go, and we piled in a vehicle Sean had never seen and left for the hallowed pick-up grounds. Grandpa and Grandma Hackworth met us there. The Cedar City airport is homey and warm and looks like a big ski lodge instead of an airport. To add to the awesomeness, we were almost the only ones there right up until the plane landed and even then, there weren't many people. It felt like our own private airport. We got up close and personal with the painted bird.

Of course, Sean waited and was the last one off the plane. When he finally came into view.....he looked blurry.

Notice the suitcase on the right.... that went with Possum on his mission and saw Sean through his.

Just kidding. He looked GREAT!!!

And sounded great!

There were hugs all around...

I couldn't stop staring....

or smiling....

And then a family photo shoot....

I had to keep touching Sean to make sure I wasn't dreaming....

This may sound the cheeseball bells, but I don't care. When I held Sean tight, the entire world faded away. I truly have never been so "in the moment" and so present. Or so proud!!

Now, I totally understand the expression "my joy is full." There wasn't a smidgen of room left in my heart for any more of it...

A video of Sean's arrival. Believe me, I wanted to burst onto the tarmac, but showed great restraint. Oh ya... and for a fun game, try to pick up on how Sean feels about paparazzis.

Thanks to my papa for these images, and Otto for getting the video: freezing time and harnessing memories.

Keep swimming,
a joy-full Ms. Fish

Vocabulary Word of the Day

WigglyWigs: n. A colloquial term used to describe a stick straight stitch, which when placed in a certain formation, gives a curvilinear appearance like John Adam's hair. Not to be confused with WigdiggetyDigs, which is an annoying practice of labradoodles and dachshunds.

Ok I'll Trust You, Ira Glass

2011-08-31T18:52:00.000-06:00

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through. ”
- Ira Glass

Like a Redwood

2011-08-29T10:58:00.005-06:00

I was driving and saw my son, Otto, coming towards me on his scooter. He appeared to have a lollipop in his mouth. As I got closer, I saw that the lollipop was ON FIRE.

No, no, no!

Later that night, we were the only two home and I cornered the boy.

When did you start smoking? I pressed. Why? How much are you smoking? Do your friends smoke?

He admitted to starting three months ago. He just wanted to see it what it was like, and now he likes how it makes him feel. No, he defended.... none of his friends smoke. "I'm the only one."

Nice. At least my son is a leader, not a follower.

I told Otto that he would probably be kicked off the Executive Council. I told him I had no problem reporting him. I grabbed for the phone to call the executive council adviser. Otto made no move to stop me, proof that this addiction had already grabbed him.

My stomach was icy cold and churning like an electric ice cream maker. I just cannot believe this.

And then I woke up.

Still, the disturbing discomfort I felt in my dream has lingered throughout the day. Those dream scenes keep flickering by and replaying themselves in my mind like the end of an old movie reel.

My intense emotional reaction re-affirmed how interconnected we are as families.... whatever my children do affects me physically and emotionally. Like the mighty redwoods, we are bound together for our life span.

Sometimes, when I'm exhausted from worry, or frustrated with choices my kids make, or hurt because they hurt, it sounds enticing to be a singular tree among a grassy meadow - with no-one to worry about and no worries about who is worrying about me.

But, for the redwoods at least, a solitary existence is incompatible with survival. Without an intertwined complex root system, even the strongest of trees topple in the wind. The strength of the redwoods....and the strength of families... and the strength of individuals... lies in the strength of connections.

Yes, the decision to have children, and the non-decision to have parents, is a commitment to a lifelong road of ups and downs. It is a commitment to entanglements: including the good, the bad, and the beautiful.

That is simply the essence of life-giving life. I wouldn't want it any other way.

Keep swimming,
Ms Fish

PS: In honor of my father who loves trees and taught me to do the same, and in homage of the symbolism described in this post, I designed a new blog topper to include a glorious tree.

And if you are fascinated by the mighty redwoods, here is an incredible TED talk about their complex eco-systems.

19 Truths About a Flower Named Daisy

2011-08-27T19:43:00.019-06:00

A long time ago, I was working at Ask-A-Nurse... a free-call center for community patrons to ask registered nurses any possible questions about health, sickness and everything in between. And believe me we got a LOT of crazy stuff "in between." But that is a story for another day...

On August 27th, 19 years ago, there I was at work: 35 weeks pregnant. I was happy as a clam taking calls and eating carrot cake that Doris Williams brought. Sometime early in the shift, I

uh..hum... warning: graphic personal details ahead....

expelled my mucus plug.

Then I started having stomach pains. Weird. Finally, after several hours of denial and ignoring the increasingly painful contractions, along with some heavy cajoling from my co-workers, I gave in to the idea that I might be in labor and drove myself to the hospital, cringing with serious labor pains along the way (I like to point this out to show how incredibly ~~stupid~~ tough I was)!

When I got to the labor and delivery floor, my cervix was dilated to 7 cm. "We'll try to stop the labor, but you are pretty far along, so it probably won't work." I was cautioned.

The stoppage efforts were futile and just before midnight we were the shell-shocked, unprepared, proud parents of a healthy 6 lb 2 oz little girl.

For three days, we couldn't think of what to name The She. And then the perfect name presented itself and Possum and I both loved it: Janessa. No middle name. Just Janessa.

Her name has varied over the years. In kindergarten, Janessa came home one day and announced that she wanted a middle name. And she wanted it to be May. Janessa May. Then a couple of years later, she wanted to be called Daisy, after her favorite flower. Daisy May. Her daddy called her "velociraptor" when she was a baby for reasons we will discuss another time when it isn't Daisy's birthday. She's had a host of other nicknames as well.

Whatever she is called, Daisy May has lived her life just as she entered it: ready and anxious for the next challenge... prepared, excited, and full of vigor. She has kept our lives busy and happy and far from dull.

As I did for her brother's birthday, here is a game called

19 TRUTHS about DAISY MAY

19 are true. 5 are false

1. Homecoming queen her senior year of high school
2. Has played the violin for 15 years
3. Absolutely loves and still keeps in touch with her first violin teacher
4. Maintained a 4.0 GPA throughout high school until she forgot one assignment her final semester
5. Went skydiving on her 18th birthday
6. LOVES math, LOVES to color, and LOVES sour candy.
7. Can quote the movie She's the Man word for word. Come to think of it, she can quote Princess Bride, Raise Your Voice, Big Fat Greek Wedding, Miss Congeniality, Napoleon Dynamite.... just pretty much any movie she's seen word for word
8. Has an extra toe on her left foot that she calls Little Nubbin'
9. Loves serving her mom breakfast in bed
10. Been on a volunteer health mission to Bolivia
11. Dreams of being a ventriloquist someday
12. Works as a dental hygiene assistant
13. Can do wicked impressions of popular YouTube videos
14. Is a sucker for cheesy romantic chick flicks
15. Can make delicious bread
16. Has handwriting a professional calligrapher would covet
17. Has had more dates than a California grove of date trees
18. Idolizes her grandparents
19. Hates potato salad. Loves to suck on watermelon rinds
20. Won't sing in public even though she has an incredible voice (shhh.... don't tell Daisy I said this, but PLEASE ask her to sing sometime)
21. Boy magnet - boy magnet - boy magnet
22. Supports her three brothers in everything they do
23. Favorite snack is bananas and cheese. Together
24. Rode a bucking bull for 7 seconds

Bonus: A dead give away that this one is TRUTH because shared below is the positive PROOF.
25. Can say all the prepositions.

You bring us happyNESS!

Thanks for 19 wonderful years.

Cold Creek Blue Grass Concert

2011-07-22T21:02:00.003-06:00

A couple of weeks ago, my parents christened their return home to the USA by taking our family to a blue grass concert. After a classic American meal of onion kissed burgers (with homemade cemita buns), potato salad, watermelon, candy chunks disguised as pineapple, and raspberry lemonade, we settled in under the stars at one of the most beautiful places on Earth. And pinch my cheeks, this giant playground is only a 20 minute jaunt from our front door.

In the outdoor Tanner Amphitheater, the five musicians known as Cold Creek were flanked by a sky scraping wall of red rocks. The breathtaking backdrop lent stark contrast to the barren stage set-up: only a single mic for each pickin' performer and their string instruments. When they started to play, it was love at first listen.

Sipping on ice-cold water and summer air, we drank for an an hour or two.

ms fish and the fam

daisy

andy

otto

Thanks mom and dad! And welcome home. To Zion.

All photos by Allen Hackworth.

Book Review: The Postmistress

2011-07-22T17:42:00.002-06:00

The Postmistress by Sarah Blake

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I had a lot of issues with this book..... until I got to the last 5 chapters.

The book was slow initially, dry and grainy as the Namib sands and hard for me to get into. It wasn't until Chapter 5 or 6 that I felt any lure to continue on. Then the story started to take hold, but I still didn't care about or know much about the characters. There were several passages (like talking about one girl's clotty menses for example) that seemed completely irrelavent other than making the book bigger. The advertised premise (what happens if you withhold a letter / information?) didn't happen until the book's "fourth quarter."

AND YET:
Along the way, there were glimpses of brilliant writing. I loved many of Blake's metaphors ("soldiers stood like daffodils in the Spring") and insightful passages. I learned a lot about the time period just prior to WWII breaking out, which is uncommonly dealt with. The book seemed well-researched, with rich period details that were unobtrusive, yet enriched the story. The news reports about France and Germany were fantastic. And in the end, two of the characters finally came to life and gave me reason to care. The book concludes with the depth I yearned for all along.

Bottom line: Blake did a decent job of exploring what takes place around the edges of a photograph....the parts you don't usually see (ie: how war affects everyday lives). Blake has great potential as a writer, and I appreciated her attempt at a compelling, fresh approach to a war story.

PS: Warning... unfortunately this book is marred by rampant cursing. Why is that necessary????

View all my reviews

30 Strangers Recap

2011-07-20T17:49:00.031-06:00

It NEVER gets old.

Hanging with the fam.

Sometimes our stories are old. I found out [on our hike up Rock Canyon] that my knees are getting old. But my family's eclectic conversations, jokes, love of granola, and laughing at shallow YouTube videos never gets old.

Neither does looking at good photography. Which was the whole reason our family got together. We couldn't miss the gallery opening of the 30 Strangers Exhibit.

It was one of the coolest evenings I've had in a long time. And I'm not talking about the efficient air conditioning system. There were lots of cool people that came to support Justin. Then the coolest of the cool read essays about Motherhood. And of course, the photos were so cool they froze time. Justin Hackworth style.

**********

Below Justin is surrounded by five heavy hitters in the writing world. They knocked it out of the park as they read incredible essays, each in their own profound style. Each confirmed that motherhood isn't for wimps, as we ironically sat wimpering with tears of heartache one minute and tears from laughter the next. The readers chartered us through a wide range of emotions: a roller-coaster ride that mimics parenthood. It felt good to FEEL, and to be reminded about the basics and the essentials.

I especially loved the essay by Amy: my SIL (below). Amy blew us all away with her incredible insights, charm, wit and wisdom. She artfully used a lesson learned while in London as the backdrop for her attitude about being a mother. Her essay skyrocketed the adage 'seize the moment' to new heights.

photo credit Allen Hackwowrth

photo credit: Ashley Thalman

Go here for the heart-wrenching, inspirational essay by Molly Jackson, a pillar of strength (far left).

Go here for the laugh-out-loud essay about Carina Hoskisson's reconciliation with motherhood. Notice (2nd from the right) she's such a good mother, she WEARS her children. Yes, that's a living breathing 3-4 week old baby in her carrier pouch sling thing.

Still waiting for Amy Hackworth, Brooke Benton (far right) and NieNie (2nd from left) to make their essays available (hint, super big hint).

And of course, Justin's perspective on motherhood was told through his photographs, which perfectly framed the essays.

photo credit: Ashley Thalman

This is my daddy and Kiera Haddock talking shop: both great photographers in their own right.

photo credit: Ashley Thalman

This is one of my favorite photos of the night. (Score Ashley) Don't you want to know what my dad is laughing at and what Kent Miles is so intently shooting? The mystery is a mark of a good photo. Plus I just love seeing my dad so juvulur (a new word which is a crafty combo of jubilant and jocular, penned at the party by the brilliant* Ryan Campbell) (*I truly mean that compliment about Ryan in the sincerest way. It has nothing to do with the fact that I want him to get us Lion King tickets.)

photo credit Ahsley Thalman

Me and my teeth were happy to be there.

photo credit Kent Miles

It was so fun to have my daughter come with me to the show. Her dress from Shabby Apple is so stinking cute I can't stand it.

photo credit Kent Miles

My beautiful mama fresh from the soil of China. She's sporting her fancy new custom-made shirt fresh from a Chinese tailor.

photo credit Kent Miles

My awesome papa in his matching custom shirt made by the same Chinese tailor. Behind this big grin is his joy to be home in America. Oh and pride in his son.

photo credit Kent Miles

Justin was a walking art exhibit himself in his fancy new suit from Garth at Perfectly Suited.

photo credit Kent Miles

Trust me. Ryan Cambell (far right) isn't yawning. He's awe-ing.

photo credit Kent Miles

There was a constant stream of people for the entire 3 hours of the reception. We could have charged admission and people would have still come. That's how good the show was.

photo credit: Brett Howell

It was a perfect evening in every way, including the JCW chili-cheese fries after the show. Oh baby! (did you see what I did there? baby? motherhood?)

My mouth is already watering for next year!!

21 Truths about a Bug named Sean

2011-07-12T15:29:00.025-06:00

When he was four, Bug learned to read.

One day grandpa and grandma came to visit. Bug asked "want me to read you the Berenstein Bears?"

"Oh yes," grandma encouraged, thinking to herself how smart Bug must be to memorize the story word for word.

After listening to the story, grandpa was still skeptical. So he pulled a book Bug had never read down from the shelf.

"Try this," Grandpa tested.

Bug took off reading the words on the page as naturally as blinking his eyelids.

Bug also showed a propensity for politics.

One day at Grandma's house, we were eating a casserole peppered with a hefty amount of onions. Trying, but unable to fully enjoy the tainted meal, Bug (age 5) finally blurted out with exasperated but faithful hope, "Does the federal government regulate the amount of onions in casseroles?"

When Bug was in kindergarten, Aunt Shauna came to visit. Grandma was visiting also.

"Want to hear Bug read?" Grandma implored as if it were a circus act.

"Sure," said Shauna... thinking she would humor the exaggerated delusions of grandparental pride.

After Bug read out loud from the Book of Mormon, Shauna asked, "how did you learn to read so well?"

Bug replied, "Heavenly Father taught me so I could teach His gospel."

16 years later, Bug is doing just that, sharing the convictions of his heart with others. Changing lives. Including his own. He is no longer my little Bug, but Elder Sean Fisher, a handsome self-assured adult!

Dull moments are not possible when you are with Sean. His easy laugh and quick wit will charm the pants right off of you (unless of course you are wearing a dress).

I am missing him like crazy today: his 21st birthday. Since he's on a mission, I can't talk to him on the phone and tell him how much we L-O-V-E him and how much joy he has brought into our family.

So instead, I'm going to share some trivia about him in a little game called FACT or FICTION. And since Sean isn't here or can't get on the internet to defend himself, it works out quite nicely.

21 Truths
Out of the 27 statements, 6 are NOT true....can you guess which ones?

Was high school valedictorian
Once had a dog named Jabba the Mutt
Doesn't like nuts. Loves mint.
Refuses to ride roller coasters
Voted Prom King in high school
Plays the accordion
Has grown 4 inches (in height) while on his mission
Can speak fluent Spanish
Got a 35 on the ACT (36 is a perfect score)
Detests Harry Potter and the entire wizarding world
Plays the piano, stand-up bass and drums
Can scratch the back of his neck with his big toe
Senior Class Vice-President in high school
Wants to certify in scuba-diving
Played high school soccer
Has a goal to buy his mother a sports car someday
Caught a fish with his bare hands
Taught our family the word antidisestablishmentarianism
Won a writing contest at BYU
Went skydiving for his 18th birthday
Was the 6th grade arm-wrestling champion
Talked with Bill Clinton face-to-face
Hiked to summit of King's Peak (highest peak in Utah)
A BIG Cougar fan
Placed first in state three consecutive years in website design for Future Business Leaders of America
Has traveled outside of the United States
Thinks being nice is more important than being smart

Cutest Bug you ever saw. Far left.

Happy Birthday Bug!

Love,
Ms. Fish

Word of the Day

Antidisestablishmentarianism: opposition to the withdrawal of state support or recognition from an established church.

Happy List

2011-07-11T16:41:00.008-06:00

Just a few things I'm lovin' right now. Summer lovin'!

Photo credit

My favorite happy place (pinterest)

A visual catalog of food and recipes (tastespotting)

A game to fight my aging brain (words with friends)

Provocative blog written by my mentor about social media & healthcare (health is social)

Joy in everday life (revelment)

Simply beautiful blog about food, life and photography (cannelle et vanille)

radio show about life's appetites (splendid table)

The Possum and the Pliers: a true fairytale

2011-05-26T00:17:00.013-06:00

He was born in the wrong century.

He'd rather operate a table saw than a computer.

He collects tools like people collect coins or vintage labels.

He can make anything... including moon boots out of duct tape.

He can fix anything. Well....almost anything......

Which brings me to a story.

========================================

Once in time, in the arid land of honeybees and industry, there lived a man called Possum.

Possum grew from a young boy who loved to play with tools into a man who loved to play with tools. Now, with thick peppery hair, bronzed muscular limbs from years of swimming, and hands strong enough to open even the stubbornest pickle jar, Possum had grown increasingly attractive with age.

He had grown in other ways too, such as his ability to purchase tools, and his ability to diagnose and treat his own physical ailments. Without having taken a single class in physiology, pathophysiology, diagnostic reasoning, or disease processes, Possum could intuitively identify what was wrong with him AND what to do to fix it, which usually involved taking mega-doses of Vitamin C.

One morning three weeks ago, Possum awoke to a find a surprising discovery: a giant gumball lodged in his right cheek. After a thorough investigation using one of my personal favorite tools (his tongue), Possum discovered there wasn't a gumball in his cheek after all, but rather an uncomfortable balloooning of buccal tissues sporting the color of a pomegranate and the pain of a hornet's sting. It wasn't long before his teeth, head, neck, jaw, and gums were throbbing with rebellious messages of something gone awry.

With his trusty diagnostic acumen and little time for a dental consultation, Possum announced a remedy for his self-declared infection. "I'll just periodically rinse my mouth with hot hot hot water and rinse / burn away the nasty little bugs. Oh... and I'll take some Vitamin C."

It worked. The pain and swelling subsided, biding him some time.

One week later, when Possum now had time to visit the dentist, he went to confirm his hypothesis. The dentist agreed. There was a fiery abscess, puddling with infection, secondary to a cracked tooth. The offending molar would need to come out. An appointment was made to return in one week for the procedure.

"It's $250 to get my tooth pulled," Possum lamented to me that night over chicken cordon bleu, which he was struggling to chew. "Plus, it's another $1800 to get an implant and a crown."

I could tell this news was weighing heavily on Possum. He hated spending money for healthcare, and especially hated spending money we didn't have. But, in this case, we had no choice. Right? Right.....unless you are Dr. Possible Possum.

He awoke the next morning with a plan.

A plan that involved his beloved tools. A plan that involved tools, tenacity and torture. A plan that completely freaked me out.

"I'm going to pull my own tooth," Possum stoically announced. "It will save us a lot of money."

"You can't do that," I protested. "What if.... what if.... what if...." I couldn't even think clearly enough to refute this silly idea. Any rationale thoughts I had were starting to be muffled by the auditory hallucinations of crunching bone pulsating against my ear drum.

A few nights later, after Otto and Andy left for a movie night with friends, Possum and I started watching Against a Crooked Sky (just kidding....neither of us remember which movie it was). After awhile, Possum got up and walked out of the house. Soon, he came back in from the ~~garage~~ tool warehouse and quietly bee-lined to the bathroom. Just like the dentist who coyly slides his barbaric bayonets, chisels, forceps and syringes up the side of a patient's face so they won't ~~faint~~ see, Possum hid whatever he had from my view.

"What are you doing?" I yelled into the bathroom a few minutes later, not sure I wanted to know the answer.

"Just going to pull out my tooth," he said as nonchalantly as if he were ordering a pizza.

I sat. And listened. And waited. And waited. I didn't hear a peep. Not a single whimper.

"Honey..... are you ok?" I called out.

"Yef...doin' feen." he mumbled.

"Well....make a noise once in awhile.... moan or something," I requested.

The sound of the silence was deafening. I didn't like it.

I couldn't imagine pulling my own tooth. Without any painkiller. And certainly without squawking like an axed chicken. For me, the quietness was synonymous with Possum passed out on the floor, crimson streams of blood splattered on the walls and dripping from his hands; his fingers clutching a pair of pliers with a naughty chunk of enameled calcium balanced between the metal prongs.

Sorry to be so dramatic....but that is exactly what I envisioned. I had serious concerns about walking into the bathroom and finding my husband sprawled out onto the floor. Dead. From pain. I didn't dare go peek. I had contracted a bad case of the heebie jeebies. (I'm a nurse practitioner?????)

After 30 minutes of punctilious prying and twisting, Possum emerged, looking quite disheartened. I quickly surmised this was either from intense pain or something worse: failure.

"Well...?" I asked.

He had loosened the tooth, but couldn't get a strong enough hold to extract it. Who would have guessed that construction pliers don't have the right teeth to grip a tooth.

Although the attempt was unsuccessful, two things came out of this experience:

I gained a new respect and attraction for my husband. It reinforced what a brave, manly, tough, resourceful hunk my man is. Once I settled down, and my shivers de-shivered and the blood washed away in my mind, I'm telling you...the idea of my man pulling out his own tooth....for us...was pretty darn sexy!!!!
We discovered a tool the toolman doesn't have.... just in time for Father's Day.

The next day, I texted Mr. Fish at work, and thanked him for being willing to go through all that to save us money. I said, "You're awesome possum."

And that's how he got the name Possum.

And that's how I came to love him [and his dwindling tooth count] even more.

And that's how we are in the process of living happily ever after.

The End

==================================

Vocabulary Word of the Day

punctilious: extremely attentive, demanding, careful

Winds of Change

2011-05-24T00:32:00.023-06:00

Weather has been weird all over the world.

Here on the home front, the blowing winds of change are kicking up a small dust storm in my soul. But a storm isn't always a disaster. It can produce positive re-arrangements, alternative solutions, and beautiful rainbows.

Not that you are the kind of person to hold a glass to the wall, but let's just say that IF you were to spy and listen through the walls of my home over the last couple of weeks, you would have heard

a) moaning (and you might have blushed until you realized the noises were from eating my bacon chocolate bar)
b) conversations like this:

# 1
Daisy: Did Otto tell you he wants to call it quits with so and so (his gal pal)?
Me: No

#2
Daisy: Did Andy tell you that he kind of likes so and so?
Me: No

#3
Daisy: Did Andy tell you that he got to go in the secret underground tunnels at school?
Me: No

#4
Daisy: Did Otto tell you that he thinks you are the coolest mom in the world... way better than Carol Brady on the Brady Bunch?
Me: No

Ok...I'm just kidding about that last one.

Did you notice, though, what is happening here? Can you sense the winds a shifting?

In the olden days (and by 'olden' here I mean 6 months ago), waaaaayy back when Otto and Andy were in their mid-sixteens, they gradually stopped telling me much of anything, unless it had to do with homemade roll requests or the need for cash.

"But Ms. Fish," an astute observer might say, "it sounds to me like they still don't tell you much of anything.... What is the change? Where are the shifts?"

Ah ha....!

Notice the boys ARE confiding to Daisy -- in a meaningful "I trust you with secrets and I want your advice" best-friends kind of way.

That is the distinction and a significant change. That is the rainbow.

rainbow cake photo credit: house of origin

photo credit: cookin' cowgirl

(Side note: should I be concerned that I think about rainbows in terms of food?)

==============================

While thick in the throes of tempestuous adolescent angst, burgeoning self-awareness and hormone-punched growth, I am coming to terms with the fact that my motherly role as a confidante is fungible for the moment. In my twin's case, they are taking the expected teen-age detour on the highway of confessions, admissions, depositions and assertions.

Oh sure.....I would love for them to spill the beans to me about every detail of their action-packed lives. Both of my older two children did and I loved the close bond that we have always shared. But I feel great solace and satisfaction that Otto and Andy's pit stop on their conversational detour is Daisy, the big sister. Instead of teasing her about boys, they are asking her about girls.

Daisy loves it too. One day, during one of our talks, nestled between the posts of my bed, Daisy shared with me the genuine happiness she feels that her brothers talk to her as a respected equal, sharing all the puzzle pieces of their lives and asking for advice on clothes, hair gel, dating and school. She feels a new level of closeness to them. It wasn't too long ago that Sean shared with me the same joy when Daisy did likewise to him. Sibling ~~rivalry~~ revelry. Thrills me.

It's a sign of our times. It's a sign that my kids are growing up. It's a sign of the inevitable shifting winds of family life.

As for me and my soul, I know that when these winds calm down and the young adulthood dust settles, Otto and Andy will once again seek me out for comfort, wisdom, advice, and scones. Always scones.

In the meantime, I love the bond that is developing between my children. I hope that never blows away.

Keep swimming,
Ms Fish

PS: Please feel free to offer your feelings on teen-age shut-outs, sibling relationships, or anything else that swirls your dust.

=================================

Vocabulary Word of the Day (somewhere in above post):

Something that is exchangeable or substitutable

If you identify the word, try incorporating it into a blog comment to me. Just for funsies.

Don't Read This....You've Got Things to Do!

2011-05-20T16:05:00.026-06:00

Well-behaved women seldom make history.

At least that is what car bumpers teach: the ones with bumper stickers that quote Laurel Thatcher Ulrich from her book of the same title which I'm reading right now for book club. I had big hopes to love it and learn the secrets to making waves while still being a genteel lady and respectable mother. But it has been a little hard for me to slog through.

Probably because

a) my sister got me playing Words with Friends which is rudely distracting
b) my brain is blitzing (see the Twitter Trap: excellent article)
c) the world is ending tomorrow and I need to MAKE history, not just READ about it

_____________________ * ___________________

I have mixed feelings about the world ending on Saturday (at least the Rapture part).

On the one hand, it's nice to know plans in advance. (True, I totally dig surprises, just not when they have to do with death). It's also nice to know that my family will all be dying together, preventing the need for mourning and wailing and gnashing of teeth and the inevitable fight (and guilt) with the funeral home about not buying the casket for my hubby with air-conditioning and automated air freshening.

The biggest benefit, the one that I'm already in rapture about------ the rapture before the Rapture--------- is that I won't have to pay back my student loans which are supposed to begin in June. Boy, I planned that well. I could just kiss Harold Camping for giving me the evidence I need to tell the loan people to take a [final enjoyable] hike. Now, I have a batch of unspoken-for funds that I can use to help in my final hours eating cheesecake, twinkies, dr. pepper, guacamole, bacon chocolate, bacon cookies, bacon pizza and bacon.

However, the impending END is not all foofaraw and gluttony. There are drawbacks and downfalls. What about the unfinished business? I was just learning about becoming a misbehaved woman and making history. I was working up to the moment of setting a goal to start thinking about becoming more interesting, friendly, successful, and philanthropic before my lights dim. I've been planning a saddleback jeans comeback in 2013. I was going to get back on track to have my annoying personality flaws ironed out in 12 years. My new New's Year slogan and bumper sticker design is in the works to say: QUIRK-FREE in 2023.

Besides unfinished business, the idea of the world ending conjures up a few regrets. My biggest one is that Mr Fish and I didn't think of this. EarthBound Pets is a purchased service that ensures your pets are taken care of by those not risen in the Rapture (all those agreeing to take care of the pets are atheists). I just kick myself that we didn't start this business. What a philanthropic gesture. Not to mention, business is booming. We would be rich enough to eat hormone-free, organic, free-range, grass fed bacon from stress-free, sunbathed and spa-treated happy pigs every single minute we have left.

By the way, if you are thinking "well shucks.... I better get me one of those plans for my little Poofy Poo Poodle-oo," you are plum out of luck. With unprecedented email volume, they have more business than they can handle. Hate to sound cold, but your pets may have to fend for themselves or live with your ex. (Haha! did you notice what I did there?)

Yes, there are definitely pros and cons to the world ending soon.

Since this may be my final post, I want the record to be known to the cats, crows and miscreants left behind: I love my God, family and religion more than anything in this world. As long as I have those, I'll be in heaven wherever I am, even earth. Amen.

In rapture,
ms fish

____________________ * ____________________

PS: Just in case.....heaven forbid (or heaven allows), there turns out to be some miscalculation and we still find ourselves here with mortgage payments and meals to cook, I'm starting a new blog feature.

The Words with Friends game, along with my friend Lexi Annie O, have inspired me to improve my vocabulary. That way, when I do arrive at the pearly gates, I can impress Peter and defend my life's choices with bigger fancier words.

So, starting today and in each subsequent blog post, I will incorporate an uncommon (in my world) vocabulary word. If you want (or are bored since you can go back to procrastinating if the world doesn't end), try and pick out that word.

____________________ * ____________________

IMPORTANT NOTE: Although I am having fun with the apocalyptic concept here, this post is not intended to mock or poke fun of good Christian (or non-Christian) people and their sincere beliefs. I want to be respectful of all people and faiths and allow them to worship how they may. I personally believe that there will be a second coming of Christ, which will be glorious, though the day is unknown. I am actually looking forward to it, though my mixed feelings will still apply.

 ____________________ * ____________________

Today's word [somewhere in this post] means:  
a fuss over a trivial matter

Graduation Week Top Twenty

2011-05-10T00:25:00.045-06:00

There are few things in my life that top last week.

You could send me to Paris for a month or Seychelles for three and it couldn't be any more delightful than the week I just spent in the dim of the Wasatch and Timpanogas mountains, with lukewarm spring weather and Skittle-colored tulips sprinkled around the city like jimmies on a cupcake. (Let's experiment... send me to Paris and then I'll let you know for sure which is better.)

All of my siblings were together. That hasn't happened since Nicholas Cage made a decent movie. We just kept celebrating one thing after another after another and the good times kept rollin'.... rollin' like a river.

So, here are the week's Top Twenty magical moments for me...... (not in chronological order)

T W E N T Y

Scoring a pair of Top Siders at Nordstrom Rack

N I N E T E E N

Slopping up garlic hummus with warm baby-soft pita bread at Aristo's

E I G H T E E N

Devouring homemade granola with strawberries and pancakes with buttermilk syrup on my brother's patio for breakfast

S E V E N T E E N

Being spoiled with an awesome Mother's Day dinner of my favs: prepared, served and cleaned up by my kids and Mr. Fish.

S I X T E E N

Watching my mom enjoy her American food (such as the taco time crispy bean burrito) after eating sea creatures and donkey meat in China

F I F T E E N

Getting news that my brother passed his anesthesia boards and is officially a board certified anesthesiologist

F O U R T E E N

Hearing that Andy, left behind in Hurricane, made the only and winning goal in Thursday's state play-off soccer game against Judge Memorial (last year's state champions).

T H I R T E E N

Moving Daisy home from college for the summer

T W E L V E

Taking in the smells [ooh ya] and sights of the breathtaking spring flowers at Temple Square and the homemade rolls at Lion House Pantry

E L E V E N

Rocking out with with the whole fam + 1,500 other freakin' fanatics at the season's 1st Provo Rooftop Concert Series (featuring Paul Jacobsen and Fictionist). And visiting with C Jane and Sarah Wiley (organizers of the event). Also you should know I couldn't really take my eyes off Jacob Jones. He hardly cracked a smile when 700 girls were screaming for him. That takes some real talent. When Fictionist gets on the cover of Rolling Stone, we will remember the night we saw them up close. It was great to soak up the balmy electric atmosphere, chomp on swedish fish, dart out of the way of crowd surfers, get confirmation from my sibs that we must all be getting old, and support my brother Justin, another one of the concert organizers and co-master of ceremonies.

photo credit: justin hackworth photography

the fictionist. photo credit: justin hackworth photography

jacob jones of fictionist. photo credit justin hackworth photography

T E N

Partying with fab four family and friends

fab four singing "Ain't Nothin' But a Dr."

melissa sings "fly" by hillary duff. jeremy accompanies on geetar

presenting each of our daughters with a butterfly necklace. now it's their time to fly.

N I N E

Getting pedicures and facials with my sisters, mom and daughter

E I G H T

Receiving a J. Crew leather satchel [big enough to hide 3 lbs of hot tamales] from the sibs; a string of genuine high-grade pearls and an iPad from my parents; and a Vosques bacon-chocolate candy bar from my supersis... she knows me WELL!!

S E V E N

Staying up till 2 am playing guitars and singing covers of the Bodine's, Head and the Heart, Lucinda Williams and Magnetic Fields, plus Hackworth originals: Holly, Peppy Peppito, and Silly Shoes and a Sundress. (Fictionist? what's the big deal. you oughta see our concert). Then all sleeping over in the same room like we did on Christmas eve as kids and waking up to presents from China!

photo credit: amy hackworth

S I X P O I N T F I V E

Having most of the family go to Heber to watch Andy's high school state quarter-finals soccer match against Wasatch.

S I X

Having over 40 family members and friends at the graduation (thanks so much!)

F I V E

Speaking at graduation [and controlling my tears]

either the dean is enjoying my speech or she just realized I'm almost finished

F O U R

Surprising my mom and dad about being a convocation speaker. They didn't find out until they read the program.

T H R E E P O I N T F I V E

Getting to bask in the company of my awesome parents after not seeing them for 8 months.

T H R E E

Talking for an hour to our missionary son on Mother's Day and hearing him laugh.

T W O

Getting hooded. Finally.

we did it together. the best friends a girl could ask for

we are smart and can model too!

aunt donna and cousins: crystal and sharlee

cousin gardner and daisy

aunt shauna and uncle kaey and cousins: gavin, andrew, rebecca

the handsome hackworth men

justin and amy

jordan and janna

my brothers: jeremy and jordan

we almost always get along

three generations. my grandmas are smiling from heaven

love mr fish

sisters

my one and only daisy

double docs: both graduates from the university of utah

the women of the hackworth

four hackworth siblings all earned three stripes on the regalia sleeves

mr fish thinks of the possibilities now that i am no longer in school

jeremy and girlfriend carisa

my family and good friend, jeff donovan. we missed andy and sean

half of our chilluns

dnp program director: dianne fuller

my capstone chair: mardie clayton

And the N U M B E R O N E M O S T M E M O R A B L E M O M E N T {drum roll please}

Freaking out when my sister from Virginia surprised me {!!!!!!!} by casually sauntering up the sidewalk outside Kingsbury Hall before the graduation ceremony. The little turkey said she couldn't come.

genuine joy

"look everybody... my SISTER is HERE!!!!!"

Thanks to my papa and his new fancy camera for taking all these incredible pictures. I am unflinchingly grateful for photographs which become my memory....."a way of holding onto the things I love, the things I am, and the things I never want to lose." - the wonder years

And thanks to my family and my dear fab friends. FOR ALL OF IT!!

No Regrets

2011-05-07T04:09:00.043-06:00

Photo credit: Freya Art

Today is the day that we almost had a wedding. It's bittersweet.

______________________ ** ______________________

Thanks and shout-out to my friend, Lexi (short for Lexicon) Annie Oakley, who wrote me this email. It meant a lot to me. Thanks Annie O. And thanks to all for the outpouring of support we have received.

How wonderful that Daisy Fish, even at such a young age, can know herself and acknowledge herself. Although I haven't conducted sufficient research to be quoting numbers, I think I will put myself out on a limb and state that 98% of women in her shoes would have gone through with it. How remarkable that she had the courage to say no, not yet. I am not ready for this. Clearly, she has a clear picture of the level of commitment that the binding promised marriage holds. To her credit that she did not enter into those essential commitments before she was ready.

It certainly would have been the easy path to rationalize "but the dress, but the invites, but the hurt feelings, the tux, the money, the effort by parents, the appearances, and so on until she stood frozen and went through with it anyway". I want you to give her the biggest hug ever from me and tell her how very wise and brave her choice and utterance of it truly was and is.

How wonderful that she has such kind and loving parents that have taught her to love herself, to know her boundaries, to speak her truth, and to not be afraid to make difficult or unpopular decisions. I have always quietly admired Daisy Fish; however, I can now state unequivocally that she has my Annie Oakley womanly respect stamp of approval. It is a true cowgirl with grit and gumption who will see the problem and not be afraid to take a difficult trail to find a solution. There is too little grit and not nearly enough gumption in the world today. Years from now, you will all look back and this time and laugh at what was learned.

Bravo to Daisy Fish for standing tall and true
Bravo to Daisy Fish even though it made her blue
Bravo to Daisy Fish for loving herself enough
Bravo to Daisy Fish for holding her head up while it's rough
Bravo to Ms Fish for loving Daisy without condition
Bravo to Ms Fish for when the time is right, will re-employed for the marriage mission
Bravo to Mr. Fish for putting up with his two women
Bravo to Mr. Fish even though in the debt he is a swimming

I send hugs, prayers, and loving thoughts to all of you at this time.
Annie O.

Ready to Rock n' Roll

2011-05-03T06:52:00.054-06:00

Jordan Medical School Grad - University of Washington

My Master's Grad - University of Utah

Justin Bachelor's Grad - University of Utah

Jeremy Medical School Grad - University of St. Louis, MO

Kristi Medical School Grad - University of Utah

Got the camera charged, the fab four video finished, my party dress pressed, and finishing up the party favors. I'm ready to roll {insert three hundred smiley faces here}.

Tomorrow we head to Salt Lake City for a grand celebration. I am so excited to be with my family... we always have such a great time together -- laughing and talking (usually about cheese and bodily functions---but not necessarily cheese-induced bodily functions) and music. Always music.

We have a packed schedule planned: girl-time with facials, pedicures and shopping; graduation party; the actual graduation and hooding ceremony, followed by dinner at Trio's; hopefully a stop at Communal; hiking and the season's first Rooftop Concert in Provo. That's a concert (free) on a rooftop. Under the stars. With blankies and loved ones. And hopefully some popcorn and a red cream soda. Topped off with the biggest family sleepover we've had in years.

We're off to see the Wizard. I'll see you on the other side of the curtain!
Keep swimming and give a little cheer for me,
Ms Fish

What kinds of things do you do at family get-togethers?

Shooting an Elephant - Goodreads review

2011-04-30T23:43:00.002-06:00

Shooting an Elephant by George Orwell

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

My dad, who is in China, shared a picture he took of an elephant... grand creatures which are ugly in a beautiful sort of way. Along with the photo, Dad suggested reading Orwell's Shooting an Elephant "to further our education."

It is a short essay written about a personal experience by Orwell. He is a police officer in Burma caught in the middle of a triangle of contempt: against the natives who resent the oppressive reign of the British and thus mock Orwell, against the British for their tyranny and against himself for his struggle of conscience versus reputation. Orwell honestly exposes his weakness and in just a short story teaches us about the evils of imperialism, the loss of freedom, resentment, prejudice and decision-making.

Orwell gives enough foreshadowing to predict the outcome, but it still was disturbing. It roused emotion. But then, that is the sign of good story / writer, isn't it?

View all my reviews

Royals versus Fishers

2011-04-30T16:40:00.047-06:00

photo credit: art union

I spent three hours of my life watching THE wedding.

Normally I wouldn't waste my precious time on such remote things, but since I have now had the experience of planning a wedding, I was more interested....uhh ......you know.... from a technical point of view.

Okay.... that part about normally not wasting my time on such things may be a little fib. But then, if I admit it's a fib, then it isn't a fib anymore is it. It's a fabricated figment of a fib foregone (aka confession).

Anyhoodle.....

I rather enjoyed the extravaganza and found it to be quite a lovely affair (read with English accent to get full effect). I was grateful to be privy to watch the whole thing. After all, did Jennifer Lopez televise her wedding for the world? See what I mean?

It was a thrill to see how Princess Kate copied Daisy's idea to keep her dress simple, classic and reminiscent of an enduring icon. As you may know, Daisy patterned her dress after the glamorous Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face (1957).

Kate chose Grace Kelley. Both classics are excellent choices to accentuate a small waist and to help the bride, rather than the dress, be the **star**.

By now I'm sure everyone's had just about enough of this whole bloomin' whipsnittle, but I am still throwing in my five shillings' worth. For my posterity's sake. Here are my five favorite parts of the wedding, besides the obvious tender moments like the double kiss; stolen glances; William steadying his bride out of the carriage; the calm, composed and pleasant Kate, etc. And come to think of it, the things I will list are, to some degree, all things that bring a sense of realism to the wedding.... reminders that although they have titles and wealth, royal people are still like all of us in many many ways.

They still have to endure the obligatory family photos. And they still pee, though this has yet to be confirmed by any of my sources. (BTW, did they just rent those children? Who are they?)

_______________________ * ______________________

Finally, without further long-winded adieu, here are my top five things in no particular order:

1. The Sneak Peek

Prince Harry couldn't resist looking back to glance at the bride then whispered the verdict to his brother, William. I loved this! So brotherly. I bet at the bachelor party William cornered Harry and said, "I double dog dare you to sneak a peek and tell me what she looks like."

2. The Ring Wrangle

William ran into a little speedbump getting on the ring. Yes, even princesses have big knuckles.

3. The Slick Hat Trick

photo credit: LA Times

Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie arrived at the ball with a giant ugly step-sister----ish chip on their shoulder.... er...I mean forehead. Since their mum wasn't invited to the wedding, I felt like this hat business was a passive-aggressive trick to somehow retaliate.

I just feel badly for Philip Treacy who is an incredibly creative designer. I hope his reputation won't be tarnished because of his hat designed to be a:

~~a huge fondant-like ribbon~~

~~a toilet bowl seat~~

~~a large IUD~~

~~antlers~~

which would be wonderfully [more] appropriate at the Moulin Rouge. Although Treacy is getting tons of free publicity. So this is probably bank.

And don't worry. Bea has some support. Someone had this to say on the FB page Princess Beatrice's ridiculous Royal Wedding hat: "I do respect Bea for recycling and wearing her grandma's 1961 theatre coat. {*stifled giggles*}"

I just love the humor that's coming out of this gutsy move.

4. The Tree Trade

photo credit: CBS News

I loved, loved, loved the use of the 20 maples and 2 hornbeam trees lining the aisle instead of ridiculous amounts of flowers. Word on the street is that every choice was deliberate and care was given to the symbolism and meaning of selected flowers and trees. The English field maple symbolizes humility and reserve, an endearing statement from a commoner entering a completely crazy new lifestyle, but wanting to maintain her roots and sense of self. The hornbeam signifies resilience. The trees were also reminiscent of Kate's home which is situated on an avenue lined with trees. Kate wanted it to be English, natural, seasonal and ethically conscious. Very cool!

5. Pippa Longstocking

She took my breath away. Pippa worked it... using this opportunity to flaunt what she's got, and she got the world's attention. The net is abuzz about the beauty of Pippa Longstocking (the nickname I gave her for that awesome long stockingesque dress). Enriching our life requires us to seize the moments. Pippa showed us how. Carpippa Diem!

_______________________ * ______________________

Overall, THE wedding was all very tasteful and beautiful. Though there is nothing simple about Westminster Abbey or the ceremonial robes worn by the priests, there was a very understated elegance - like feel to it. And that, for me, was the WOW factor.

Funny...that's just how our wedding was going to be.

Almost.

Except less praying. And we were having Jordan Almonds and frappé. Unfortunately for them, I didn't see any signs of those in the palace.

Keep swimming,
Ms. Fish

PS: I loved the Queen's springy yellow dress!! Joy Behar, you're a bah humbug.
PSS: And I bet the ceremony priests could rock a Neil Diamond song! I am in love with their voice.

POST Publishing Addition:
One of my other favorite moments was when Kate first walked out onto the balcony and was astounded at the amount of people there. I loved her spontaneous, genuine, and humble reaction!

Better Than Cheese

2011-04-27T07:00:00.014-06:00

It's no secret my journey through graduate school was made sweeter and easier by four ROCKIN' friends (five in our master's program - giving us an attrition rate of 20%). We drove 8 hours every three weeks for 18 months to climb the doctor's mountain. We stayed together in one hotel room. Ate at over 30 restaurants. Traveled over 3,674,000 miles (a rough estimate).

Now we are graduating together [again] and throwing ourselves a [nother] PARTY!!!! (And since I just learned how to make stripes in photoshop, I tried to see how many I could cram onto the invite.

When we graduated with our master's degree in 2009, I presented each of my friends with a gift: a hardback book that I designed and wrote. Called The Path to Practitioner, it chronicled our journey together in becoming nurse practitioners through pictures and stories. I can't speak for my friends, but for me, I love this little book more than cheese (which is like saying more than Lisa Lampanelli loves jokes which is like saying more than Steve Jobs loves money which is like saying more than Charlie Sheen loves.... well you get the idea).

Here is a peak inside the book. That's us on the front cover. We look so Charlie's Angel-ish (which now seems sort of sacrilegious.... to have Charlie and Angel in the same sentence).

Here is what the Author's Note says in the right hand side above:

I love this photograph taken by my brother. It shows great perspective about obstacles and the vast freedom and opportunity which lie beyond. During school we faced roadblocks which seemed impassable. But success came with creative solutions: the greatest was an unlikely friendship of five very different women. Our friendship was special. It was rare. And together, we got around the walls. As the Beattles put it, "I got by with a little help from my friends." I hope you enjoy this story of our journey. It will never be repeated. It can only be remembered. Love, Jenni

You can see a preview of the book here.

Now, ssshhhh, it's a surprise what I am working on to give the girls for THIS graduation. All I can say is that it feels good to wrap my hands around a bone folder. It's been a long, long time.

OUR Big Day

2011-04-25T16:27:00.005-06:00

27 years ago in high school, my boyfriend and I promised each other we would get a doctorate degree.

Then we tripped out of love and went our separate ways and I haven't seen him since my sophomore year of college. But I've never forgotten that promise to him, and even more importantly, to MYSELF.

So in 2005, I started graduate school and have been mired in books and papers ever since. I'm now a little grayer and a little wiser with a much bigger vocabulary. And finally, in 10 days, I will officially be hooded at the commencement exercises at the University of Utah. I am so, so excited!! Mostly because it is a great excuse to have all my family in one place. My brother is coming from Virginia, and another one from San Diego, and another one is coming from clear across Provo. Plus my parents are flying over from CHINA. Can you believe it??? That is some serious parental support. I bet you a package of pickled peppers that they will win the award for farthest traveled. Gosh how I love my mom and dad, and all my fam.

Yes sir and ma'am. It's going to be a great, great day.

Here is the invite I designed. I hope it reflects my joy and the gratitude I feel for my family. This is OUR accomplishment, after all.

Easter

2011-04-23T00:50:00.007-06:00

Photo credit: Tip Junkie. Click here for tutorial

Photo credit: hello naomi

Rainbow Jello Eggs. Click here for tutorial

Photo credit and tutorial: Good Housekeeping

Photo credit and tutorial: Modern Parents Messy Kids

Photo credit: Made

Whenever I think of Easter dinner, I think of my grandma's floral china, ham, fresh roasted asparagus, deviled eggs, strawberries, and lemonade.

Deviled eggs are my kid's FAVORITE. Actually, we started calling them ANGEL EGGS.... cuz they are really heavenly and don't have a devilish bone in their creamy sweet little bodies.

photo credit

Grilled asparagus is one of my all-time favorite dishes. It is so easy, yet fresh, flavorful, healthy. Simple goodness. It bespeaks Easter in a mouthful... sort of resurrects my tastebuds! (The recipe link is below. I alter the recipe slightly by seasoning with Mrs. Dash, plus Celtic Sea Crystals).

Roasted Asparagus. Recipe here.

Of course, what would spring holidays be without strawberries. Holy Easter Eggs! I LOVE, LOVE my Strawberry Spinach Salad!

photo credit

Or how about some Strawberry Lemonade Bars for dessert?

Photo credit and recipe here

If I invited you to my house for dinner this Sunday and asked you to bring your FAVORITE Easter dish, what would you bring?

Go ahead and share your ideas in the comments. My mouth is watering in anticipation!

Wilted Wednesday

2011-04-20T16:14:00.008-06:00

Sometimes I feel intimidated by my own family.

Sometimes I wonder why in the world I got dropped into the family I did.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone else has ever felt this way.

____________________________ * ____________________________

Just for funsies, let's take a little family tour. One of my relatives, Gordon Gee, President of Ohio State, was named one of the top 10 college US College Presidents. My uncle (mom's brother) is the Director of Finance for the state of Idaho and answers directly to the governor. He is highly respected in government and a popular speaker. My mom's other brother is the Senior Vice-President of one of the largest healthcare organizations in the country. He is a noted author, popular speaker and received Modern Healthcare's "Up and Comer's" award. My cousins are accomplished authors, writer's, journalists, computer programmers for the IRS, doctors, playwrights, composers. My siblings are chief residents, famous photographers, award-winning physicians, and highly accomplished bright individuals. My parents are amazing people who travel the world and have made friends in nearly every country. They render so much service and have made such an impact in the lives of people. They do SO much good.

____________________________ * ____________________________

Then there is me. A simple mom who is still looking for a job.

____________________________ * ____________________________

One of my friends was scheduled for an upcoming performance in the St. George Tabernacle. Another friend (Bridget) and I wanted to go hear her. We were talking about how talented our friend was, and Bridget said something that really struck me. She said, "performers need great audiences. Some people are blessed with the talent to perform, and I am blessed with the ability to love and appreciate a good performance. My talent is helping the performer look good."

I have since thought about this idea a lot. Since then, I have come to realize that maybe my purpose in the family is to help make them look good. I am like a shoe shiner whose life's work is to bring out the luster in something beyond myself. Heck, since I am average, the above-averageness of my family looks even better by contrast. I am good at helping my family look good.

The older I get, the more I am learning to value what is often not valued: being ordinary. Being ordinary takes courage - the courage to find, live and embrace my own story, and truly accepting that I am enough just as I am. Sometimes when I think about the ambitions, talent and accolades of my family, I start feeling the pull that part of my pre-written story means performing, pleasing, and proving. But if I am honest with who I am and who I am supposed to be, I accept that playing a supporting role is just as worthy of an Oscar as the leading role.

Do you ever feel this way? Are you comfortable with your story? Do you have the courage to be ordinary?

Keep swimming, and enjoy this nourishing song.
Ms Fish

Hello

2011-04-18T08:26:00.013-06:00

Last weekend was the Prom for Otto & Andy.

Which reminded me of my Prom. Which then reminded me of the music I loved as a teen. Which then reminded me of Madonna and Huey Lewis & the News. Which then reminded me of Lionel Ritchie. Which then reminded me THIS:

Happy Monday! Thanks for swimming by.

Ms Fish

Wedding Wednesday: The Rehearsal. Oops... I mean The Reversal

2011-04-12T23:36:00.007-06:00

Welcome to another installment of Wedding Wednesday!

I have really had fun planning this wedding so far, except for trying to figure out how I was going to break the news to Mr. Fish that Daisy and Jordan wanted to release live butterflies. Have you ever seen see Steve Martin in "Father of the Bride?" Let's just say Steve took lessons from Mr. Fish when preparing for that movie role.

It's been fun sharing our plans bit by bit with you, whoever you are. I've got a lot more to talk about like the darling favors, the buttons (yep. personalized. professional. name buttons for guests), the decorations, the custom painted banner, the graffiti photo booth, the food.... oh gosh....the delicious food, the release of authentic sky lanterns, the plan for the bride and groom to skydive into the reception (remember the theme: jumping for joy?) But as it turns out....

I've been fired.

I am no longer the wedding coordinator because the wedding has been indefinitely postponed. My Do-List has shriveled by 90%. I feel like the UPS man just dropped off a big package of TIME at my door.

Daisy called last week and told us she couldn't go through the with wedding. She doesn't feel right about it and isn't ready for marriage. We love Jordan and wish the best for him and his family. We love Daisy too, and hope that she will continue to feel peace with her decision and that she will be happy! We just want everyone to be happy. And we want Macy's to let us return the ties.

So I hereby declare this post the grand finale of Wedding Wednesday. Thanks so much for reading along.

Lots of love,
Ms. Fish

PS: The day after Daisy called things off, we got 500 invitations in the mail. They are beautiful. So if you know anyone named Janessa and Jordan who are getting married on May 7, please send them my way & let them know they could totally have these invitations. They are awesome possum! For free! That's one heck of a deal!

a glimpse of invite assembly instructions....

Wedding Wednesday: Attire

2011-04-07T00:50:00.019-06:00

So today is Wedding Wednesday on a Thursday. Forgive me?

And by the way, before I get to wedding stuff, I have to announce the good news. My brother and his awesome family who have lived in Virginia for.almost.ever are moving back to the West. Praise the barbecued porkribs - he's finally seen the light! My brother says: "moving to where we can make it to every holiday, family party, weekend barbeque and sundry hootenanny makes me happy." (Can you sense how cool he will be to have around... with his ability to teach me new words...when was the last time you heard the word sundry?)

____________________ * ____________________

Now about this wedding. It's only about one month away. HOLY PEPPERONI!... minor freak out moment there.....

Let's get my mind off that and talk about clothes.

I don't know why, but the clothes have been one of the most stressful parts of planning. Daisy and I have spent more time trying to pick out the right outfits for everyone than most people spend picking house plans. Seriously, you would think we were outfitting Michelle Obama for the inauguration! We have many considerations: cost, cleavage coverage, coordination and trying to please everyone whose tastes are as different as Puerto Rico and Paris. Course there is also a good chance that we just aren't very good at this sort of thing.

Our first decision was how similar we wanted everyone to look. Some brides like everything MATCHY MATCHY.

photo credit: the huffington post

Others prefers things a little more open to self expression....

photo credit: the knotty bride

Another style, which is a blend of those two, is what I call "complimentary matching." (I'm lovin' these breezy summery cotton dresses: same pattern, different complimentary fabrics).

Daisy chose Complimentary Matching. The bridesmaid's dresses are being sewn as I type this posting---custom-made in silk. They will all be the same pattern (designed by Daisy): three teal & three silver. The girls will wear their choice of shoes, and their own embellishments (ie: jewelry, flowers, belt, etc) to reflect their individual style.

The men were tougher. Jordan was adamant: he didn't want a tux. So none of the other groomsmen would be in a tux either. Then Daisy and I realized we couldn't afford to buy suits for all the groomsmen and we couldn't ask them to buy a new suit (except the fathers... we asked them to buy a new suit and they grumbled and then mumbled "whatever you want Daisy"). So no suits. And no vests.

We settled on gray pants (of their own choosing... any shade... complimentary matching and all...) and white shirts.

WHITE SHIRTS! Are ya kidding me?

That's what I imagine our photographer will say when he finds this out. Our photographer, one of the best in the land, doesn't advise wearing white for any photo. No-no-no white. Something about light and eye and attention and distractions and technical mumbo jumbo that translates into "just trust me, don't wear white."

Well..... half of the people will be wearing white.

But we'll make up for that discomfort with the ties. They are SWEET! They are all different but in the coordinating color scheme. I call it complimentary matching. (hmmmm heard that before? Yes... so it's time you know...I have very few skills. But I do have a skill of making up names for things by simply stating the obvious... like complimentary matching. My other skill is to subtly repeat the names I have made up more than once in an explanation. I call that repeating explanations).

The groom will be the lone gray tie man, and everyone else will be sporting blues and teals.
Here's to hoping it will all match. Complimentarily. And not look like we suffered an acute bout of schizophrenia.

Resources

Father of the Bride / Father of the Groom Matching Dark Gray Suits / Groom light gray suit: Perfectly Suited by Garth / Mother of the Bride: Jessica Howard - Christensen's / Ties: Express, Macy's / Bride's Shoes: Jeffrey Campbell (American made yeah!) - Nordstrom / Bridesmaid Dresses: Custom / Wedding Dress: Custom / Bride's Reception Exit Dress: Shabby Apple / Alterations: Lady Danburry

See you next week when I discuss some of the decorations.

Lots and lots of love,
Ms Fish

Wedding Wednesday: The Invitations Part II

2011-03-30T14:49:00.024-06:00

Bleeds and cuts.

Now we were talking about things in my world!

Then the convo continued about CMYK versus RGB colors and I realized we were [again] out of my element. And the bleeds and cuts had nothing to do with biophysiology.

Thanks goodness for experts.

I admit though, this process of designing the monogram and invitations has been so much fun. I have learned some great things about graphic design.

Partly because our invitations have been complicated.

I can hear my husband saying, "no duh!"

He is painfully aware of my genetic anomaly. I acquired the "make things hard" gene which sticks its DNA nose into just about everything I do, like a raccoon sniffing around where he shouldn't belong.

Part of the reason for the complication has to do with the unconventional schedule of events: marriage in May. Reception in August. If you think about that for a minute, you will realize the logistical problem that creates. (I'm asking you to think, so I won't have to type it all out. It's my lazy gene coming through.)

Our graphic designer for the invitations, Jeanine Gee, has been brilliant, thorough, clever, thoughtful, and above all PATIENT. With my 'eye for detail' (which could be stated another way... but this blog is family friendly), I most certainly have driven Jeanine to the crazy farm. But she laughs and smiles and makes my suggested changes cheerfully, all the while thinking how she would like to hire a MOB to take out this M.O.B. Jeanine has been awesome!!!

Every single detail: from the colors to the wording to the layout to the spacing has been deliberately and carefully thought out. The "final proofs" have been finalized and submitted for final proofing more than once, but alas as of today, they are now officially finalized. They are in the big no-going-back printing queue. Jeanine and I are waiting on pins on needles to make sure that the printers do all the scores, cuts, and folds correctly. If all goes as planned, we should have invitations ready to mail in 2 weeks. They will require some assembly (a subliminal shout out for possible volunteers??).

Daisy, Jordan, and the mother-of-the groom are happy with them. Whew! They have a daisy motif and are colorful: just like Daisy wanted. Plus, they even have a little gift included for all recipients. But don't get your hopes up. It isn't candy.

_______________________ * ________________________

Now for those diehards, who want to learn a little about how color works.... read on. It's really quite fascinating (if you are trying to find an excuse for not getting off the computer and cleaning the house....)

If it is important that the color of any two components match (ie: the monogram with the invitations), so you must be picky in selecting colors. Otherwise I promise you they won’t match. RGB stands for Red Green Blue — the way something creates color when emitting color (light). CMYK is how color is created when reflecting color (light), using cyan magenta yellow and black. There is a world of difference between emitting and reflecting so converting an RGB color mix to a CMYK value can produce varying results. The very best way to match a color you want is to actually mix the ink with a formula, like you do with wall paint. Using RGB values is far from a guarantee that things will match. Bottom line: when submitting to a printer, use CMYK colors and choose the colors based on a colorbook, not from a computer monitor.

_______________________ * ________________________

Lots of love, and sorry about missing last week. How I thought I could blog AND do a DIY wedding and try to keep up with my busy twins is beyond me! Thanks so much for your comments and interest. That really helps me keep going.

Ms Fish

PS: Pictured at the top is the monogram which will pop up in various ways throughout the wedding. Thanks to our designer, Gheen Hillman, for creating this clever design, which symbolizes Jordan and Janessa as individuals, but also united as the center of the Woods' family tree.

Danger at East Canyon + What's the Difference Results

2011-03-21T15:54:00.033-06:00

The beautiful East Canyon Resort Condominiums

We stood in the waning light. Frozen.

Not because of our temperature, but because of what we saw.

Seconds earlier, we were making our way back from visiting the bubbly outdoor hot tub, beach towels circling our torso, poised to mop up the water our swimming suits were holding hostage. Under normal conditions, if I was standing under a cosmic canopy in the biting March mountain air, dripping wet with saturated spandex covering only 1/4th of my body, I would be shivering. And complaining. But tonight my liver and heart, having been sufficiently marinated, rewarded me with with uncommon warmth. I was grateful for that.

We had been contentedly walking along the sidewalk, when Mr. Fish suddenly blurted a firm directive.

"Stop! Look!.. There are three pairs of raccoon eyes right over there."

Sure enough, across the parking lot about 75 yards away, were three pairs of shining, glow-in-the-dark orbs. They looked just like cat eyes in the dark. Only more menacing. They pierced. And stared. They were frozen, too. Apparently we looked quite menacing ourselves, with our bare hairy legs and all.

Earlier, we had seen a live raccoon, climbing from our garbage just outside the condo kitchen window. The critter appeared quite smug having found a bonanza of sausage scraps. So, we knew we were imposing at their resort.

Immediately, as it usually does in precarious situations, our conversation turned to survival tactics.

"What would you do if those raccoons ran toward us?" Mr. Fish prompted.

I took a quick survey of our location. We were walled in with two-story condos on either side, and fences lining the cement path. To make a successful get-away, I would either have to dust off my ~~rusty~~ [non-existent] Olympic hurdle skills or race the critter to our front door, in the dark, dripping, with shoes half-hanging off my feet. Neither option sounded appealing. Or safe.

"I would try to kick them away" said my manly hunk of protecting love.

"Kick them away?" I answered timidly. "But what about their...."

"I know." Mr. Fish butted in. "They have razor sharp teeth, and claws that could tear your flesh into...."

His voice faded away as we silently finished this sentence in our own imaginations.

"But they would have to be rabid to attack us like that" Mr. Fish confidently taught.

"Uh...huh." I reticently agreed, still scoping out possible escape routes, and thinking what I would use to stop the bleeding on my heroic husband's sacrificial leg.

My 'possibles' were interrupted by the chattering of our sixteen year old twins who stayed behind to take advantage of the sauna and were now catching up to us.

"Ssshhhh" Mr. Fish urgently whispered. "We are watching some raccoons."

"Where?" they responded with an excited urge. "Let's try to catch one!" Which is their standard ambition for anything we see, including out-of-town female youth groups.

"Right over there, in front of that garage on the condo across the parking lot. There are three of them. One in front and two smaller ones behind. They are sitting still, just staring at us." Mr. Fish muffled quietly so as not to disturb the other hoards of wild animals that could have been silently lurking and poised to pounce.

Then Andy, with his 16 year old retinas, said in a polite and heavily restrained smirk... "Uh.... mom and dad....those are grates on the garage door, just reflecting the light from inside the garage. That's why they are standing so still."

At least I think that last sentence is what he said. Hard to tell between the roar of laughter that ensued from the sauna boys.

Mr. Fish and I, doubtful of this absurd accusation, took a few tentative steps closer to confirm OUR hypotheses, and subsequently took a few steps closer to a remaining lifetime of humiliation.....

......because the sauna boys and their 16 year old memories won't let us live this one down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Keep swimming and... remember to have an annual eye exam.
Ms. Fish

________________________ * _______________________

In other news:

Congrats to BONNIE who said, "I got it. Easier than the others. Thanks for these fun games. Sad to see them end." You are the winner in our final "What's the Difference" game. Please email me (link above) and I will send your prize. And thanks to all who played.

Wedding Wednesday: The Dress Part II

2011-03-16T00:51:00.007-06:00

Well, the invitations aren't quite finished and ready to show you. But they are looking good and should be ready to print next week. We are so grateful for our talented and clever graphic designer, Jeanine Gee! Our somewhat complicated request required some impressive design skills....

In other developments: engagement pictures were taken Friday by the inimitable Justin Hackworth.

What's that? You want to hear an update about the dress? Ok...well thanks for asking!!

We have a wedding dress! And Daisy is in love! With Jordan yes, AND now her dress!! [Why do I speak in rhyme all the time?? Should I be worried??]

On Monday, every nook and contour of Daisy was measured. Thursday we returned and the shell of the dress was basted together. Amazing! The first pinning session took place.

We went back on Friday for another tweaking, and then on Saturday for the final try-on. Daisy loves the pockets!!!

The dress is great... except for.... well..... I'm sorry to have to bring this up, but sometimes there are snags and so I'm just keepin' it real by sharing this!

At the Friday fitting last week, Debbie the dressmaker, measured for the hem and mentioned it would be a horsehair type. Not being a fine dressmaker myself, or a rodeo queen, or a horse trainer, or horse rider, or hair-types connoisseur, I was unfamiliar with that term. But up to this point, everything about the dress was exactly like the picture we had given Debbie the dressmaker. So I assumed the hem would be a hidden hem...as in the photo. Turns out, a horsehair hem is NOT hidden and is a small underturn with very noticeable stitching.

I don't care for the hem. It looks casual and homemade. Debbie says the horsehair hem is to give the edge a crisper look, which is what you generally want with a silk fabric. A blind hem gives a softer, floatier edge.

I like soft. I like floaty.

So now what? The length is perfect, and to make a new hidden hem would make the dress too short. Janessa doesn't mind it and so I guess I shouldn't either.

I learned a great lesson through this though. Don't make assumptions and ask questions. Be specific when describing what you want. Oh...I live and learn.

Lots of love,
Ms Fish

PS: I'm curious...what would you do in this case? Would you say anything to the dressmaker about your disappointment?

What's the Difference: Tulips

2011-03-14T07:00:00.000-06:00

Hello and Happy Monday!

Are you ready to play What's the Difference?

Today's game is brought to you by the letter T.

For Tulips (my favorite Spring flower). And Tunes.

Here are the rules for today's game...

1. There are THREE differences between the two pictures (besides the labels).
2. After you find them, simply leave a comment on the blog, indicating you know what they are. But PLEASE don't spill the beans in the comments.
3. On Thursday, a person will be chosen at random to receive this week's prize....

drum roll..........

a $15 iTunes Gift Card.

Tadah! Time to Tickle your ears with Terrific Tunes

After a winner has been chosen, I will email you and then you can tell me what the differences are. If you are right, I'll send your prize. If you are wrong (which you won't be because I like to look at the bright spring sunny side), then I'll pick another person. Randomly.

Photo credit: Karen Waldrond

Happy staring and thanks for playing.

Keep swimming. And if you want a great song suggestion to buy with your iTunes gift card, how about Spring by Vivaldi. It's sure to make you think of butterflies and blossoms.
Ms. Fish

PS: I saw some tulips!!!! For reals.... that means this is the final "What's the Difference?" game. It's been fun for me. How about you?

Confessions of a 1000-Thread Count Sheet Lover

2011-03-13T15:09:00.023-06:00

I want to make a confession. Which could be misconstrued as a rant. Or a gratuitous plea for support. If you choose to take a more jaded view. I prefer to think of it as a healthy admission.....a step on the winding path to self-enlightenment.

I do NOT like cheap stuff.

I do not like it Sam-I-Am. I do not like cheap filler-injected ham. I do not like the dollar store. I do not want to shop there more.

_______________________ * _________________________

Which brings me to the topic of more disclosure. I have a certain talent and skill which has complicated my life. This skill is basically a special super power. I have an internal honing device that can identify with laser-like precision the most expensive item in any store. I can pick it out AND it is almost always the very item I loooove the most! This has become a running joke with Mr. Fish. If I show interest in something, we don't even have to check the pricetag to KNOW it is the most expensive item in the store. Someone should hire me to sniff out the best products. I would be a killer contestant if they make a new game show: THE PRICE IS HIGH.

I can't help it. I would much rather have ONE pair of $200 quality leather boots that will wear well and just get better-looking and more comfortable with age than have ten pairs of $20 shoes from Target. Quality over quantity. Any day. And always.

_______________________ * _________________________

I am tired of cheap stuff.

Daisy just bought a pair of shoes, wore them once and the sole is worn out. Bah!!

Oh sure, expensive doesn't always equate to quality. But it's often a good indicator. I'm not saying I love paying full inflated prices for things. I love a good sale. But there is no doubt I am attracted to nice, quality things.

_______________________ * _________________________

This has at certain times (read: always) been an itty bitty source of contention between my husband and me. He likes cheap stuff.

He likes cheap stuff because it is a survival tactic.
He likes cheap stuff because of our career choices.
He likes cheap stuff because we have four teen-agers whose expenses are equivalent to the national budget of New Zealand.
He likes cheap stuff because he is content.
He likes cheap stuff because his wife doesn't.

His healthy ways are quite sickening. Well... honestly, his ways have kept us solvent.

My skills are dangerous. It makes it hard. I would rather not have a couch at all and ask our company to sit on the floor while we wait until we can afford a leather couch. Mr. Fish is totally content with getting a couch passed over from my parents. But only because that is the way he has to be. And I really do appreciate and love him for that. Someday, when we have the means, he will like nice things too.

The bottom line is that I have everything I need. Arms. Legs. A few molars for chewing. House with heat. Car that [mostly] runs. I am seriously blessed with my second-hand sofa and a closet with Payless shoes.

And yet... I can't ignore my inner yearnings. I confess.

_______________________ * _________________________

Can you tell which shoe has the highest price? My super powers could tell. Your foot could tell.

One of these shoes is $24.99. The other is $345.00

Keep swimming and supporting American-made products.
Ms. Fish

Worrying

2011-03-12T22:04:00.000-07:00

I totally believe this! I just wish I could live it.

Photo credit: Back to Her Roots

Wedding Wednesday: The Dress

2011-03-09T21:17:00.008-07:00

THE DRESS

One of the most talked about, anticipated, and iconic parts of the wedding.

One of the pieces of clothing that takes the longest to find.

One of the most important factors in the wedding to help the bride feel amazing, confident and beautiful!

One of the most visible ways for the bride to showcase

HER STYLE

______________ * _____________

There are so many dresses to choose from. But even though there are thousands of dresses, finding one that is the right fit, right style, right fabric, right coverage, and right price is challenging, especially if you are picky. And I'm not naming names, but someone in our bridal party is....shall we say....determinedly selective. (Is determinedly a word??)

We did a lot of the initial searching legwork online, and then looked at traditional bridal shops as well as independent boutiques and even secondhand stores. Finally we decided that hiring a seamstress to make a custom dress was the best way to merge price, design and fit. Daisy found the a picture of the PERFECT dress for HER!!! Now, she could have that very dress, plus a little of her own personality thrown in (i.e. pockets for her lip shine!)

We first contacted Melissa Blackburn, who makes absolutely stunning dresses. She is delightful and extremely picky about getting the right fit and pleasing the bride. However, her specialty is making very elaborate, complicated, and unique gowns. Daisy's gown is very simple. So hiring Melissa was like bringing in a Caterpillar to dig a hole for a tulip bulb. Overkill.

So, we hired Debbie Camp, who has a lot of experience sewing custom bridesmaid and wedding dresses. We met with Debbie two days ago for the first measuring / fitting. We selected the fabric, a beautiful white silk as smooth as a pearl and as soft as a caterpillar (ok, I'm at my brother's house right now and the walls are plastered with trucks and tractors drawn by my nephews... caterpillars are on the brain...sorry). We chose silk because it will be much cooler than satin, a necessity for our blazing hot St. George summer!

Daisy and I are hanging out in Provo all this week, while Debbie works her magic. We will go back to Debbie's for three more fittings, the final one on Saturday. By that time there will just be a few minor alterations needed, then we can go home. Debbie will make those alterations and ship the dress to Daisy next week: with a perfect fit and exactly what she dreamed of!

Here is a little teaser....the photo the dress is patterned after. The dress is short, hitting mid knee.

Again...summer. St. George. Hot. And remember the THEME: a short dress is much easier to jump in. And remember the style: simple, classic, timeless. Well... ok...a short dress isn't classic. Two out of three ain't bad.

I'll let you know how the dress turns out!

Lots of love,

Ms Fish

PS: If you are still wanting to hear about more wedding stuff, tune in next week when I discuss THE INVITATION.

Wedding Wednesday: Theme

2011-03-02T01:11:00.012-07:00

One of the first things Daisy did for the wedding plans is to choose the colors (turquoise, cerulean blue, silver and white). Actually, that decision was made when she exited the womb. She has always been a bright blue girl.

Next Daisy and Jordan (the groom)...heretofore known as DJ.... decided on a theme. We wanted a theme to give structure, consistency and direction to the event. Which is really four separate events: the actual wedding, a luncheon, an open house in Ogden and a reception in Hurricane (which is not really a reception...but more of a party. A par-tee!!) Since we have a theme, then it becomes the THEME that guides decisions and helps keep things focused. Sometimes Mr. THEME has to be the bad guy.

"No, we can't have synchronized swimmers. It doesn't fit the theme."

We wanted the theme to be fun and personal and totally represent DJ. Jordan is trying to get into the Air Force. He dreams of being an aerospace engineer and eventually flying private airplanes. He loves flight and space and air and flying and planes. He is also a certified skydiver because he loves flight and space and air and flying and almost dying. Daisy can't wait to skydive because she loves Jordan. So our theme took flight---

LOVE IS IN THE AIR

but then something crazy happened.

DJ decided they wanted to skydive into their reception, which isn't a reception but a party.
So we changed the theme.

JUMPING FOR JOY!

because they really are! We all are!

So The Party, formerly known as Reception, will have things related to jumping...live frogs on lily pads all around the perimeter, a blow-up jump house, 3 trampolines with hired acrobats for entertainment. Ok not really...but we may have a trampoline. Seriously. More on that later. And maybe a skydive jump by the bride and groom. There are lots of hoops to JUMP through to make that happen. We are working on it. We'll see.....

Besides the theme.... we had to decide on a STYLE. Daisy is clear: she doesn't want it to be trendy or vintage (which is basically synonymous). She does want it to be classic, timeless, simple, with a touch of whimsy. So there you go....let's hope we can pull it off.

Lots of love,
Ms Fish

PS: Tune in next week when I discuss the DRESS!

What's the Difference: Eagle Eye

2011-02-28T07:00:00.018-07:00

It's Monday!

Time to play: What's the Difference?

Today's game is a little easier than last week. I think {??}. There are FIVE differences between the two photos (lighting variation is NOT one of them). Have fun.

Photo credit: the inimitable Justin Hackworth

Keep swimming. And did you know that a group of owls is called a parliament? Me neither.
Ms Fish

Choices + What's the Difference Results

2011-02-26T00:28:00.087-07:00

Photo credit: Cores de uma cidade by Rafael Saes'

I used to ask my kids at bedtime if they wanted to get their jammies on. It was the kind of slippery-slope question I would ask before I figured out that kids were not simply adults hiding in a size 6X. When I asked that question, our conversations would be similar to this:

Me: Do you want to get your jammies on?

Otto: No

Me: Are you sure you don't want to cuddle up in your warm snuggly jammies?

Otto: No

Me: Don't you want to get ready for bed?

Otto: No

Me: Do you want to brush your teeth?

Otto: No

Me: Why don't you want to get your jams on?

Otto: Because I'm not stupid, mom. What kid in his right mind wants to quit playing and lie down in the dark all by themselves and be bored until they can fall asleep?

Me: Okay that's enough of that kind of talk. You go in there right now and get your jammies on. It's time for bed.

Otto: But you asked if I wanted to and I said No.

Me: I only asked if you wanted to because I thought you would want to.

Otto: Well I don't want to.

Me: Well you should want to. That's the sensible thing to want. I'm exhausted and I want to go to bed, so you should too. Plus, I'm the mom, so you do what I say. And I say that you want to get your jammies on.

Otto: But....

Me: No buts... you get your jammies on or else.

Otto: Or else what?

Me: Or.... or else..... or else I'm going to go live in a hotel and rent some children who want to get their jammies on. I'm sure there are starving children in the world starving for jammies. They'd be grateful for jammies.

Otto: Okay then. C-ya later.

Me: What do you mean seeya later? You'd say goodbye just like that? You're not even going to put up a fuss?

Otto: No, I'm not in the mood to fuss.

Me: Well, then I'm telling Santa about THIS one! If you don't get in there right now and get on your pajamas and put up a fuss about me wanting to leave, I'll tell Santa not to come. Don't make me do it.

Otto: Oh... original mom....the old Santa trump-card trick. Ok. Alright. I'm going. But don't forget to put an ad in the paper for those children.

________________________ * _________________________

After awhile, I wizened up, and learned to ask better questions so I didn't have to give threatening answers.

Me: Would you like to get your jammies on before or after your bedtime story?

That way it was a matter of when not if they wanted to get ready for bed. A subtle but brilliant difference!

Kids need the opportunity to make decisions about things that matter to them, like going to bed or hanging out with friends on a schoolnight. So, I changed my tactics purposely giving choices that:

limited the options
guaranteed the most appropriate outcome for the situation

all under the guise of free agency.

Is this a manipulative mommy trick? I don't think so. It is simply a more effective way of empowering children with the ability to make choices...choices where both child and parent can honor the final decision.

________________________ * _________________________

Sometimes I wish the best path was a narrow one-way street lined with cobblestones

to clearly mark the way.

As our children have gotten older, the stakes have been raised. The decisions have become harder with more choices, the consequences more enduring with heavier weight. My 16-yr old son is facing a difficult decision right now. He's at a crossroads and whichever road he chooses has the potential to affect his future. It's a big deal in his teen-age world.

It's humbling and scary to watch my children make consequential decisions. And to give them the trust and latitude to do so. They might screw up. The chances are high they will at one time or another. I certainly have. That's the roll of the life dice. And the risk of agency.

I hope we've taught our children the steps to good decision-making and how to listen and recognize answers from prayer. And how to accept what comes. I hope that all the little opportunities to make decisions like when to get jammies on, or whether to go to a football game if it means staying up till 2 am doing homework, have taught them what they need to know about choice, accountability, the ripple effect on others, and following their inner voice.

I hope with my son, I have the strength to not chime in and make the decision for him. I'm a chimer. And a rhymer. I'm a joker. I'm {not} a smoker. I'm {not} a midnight toker. I sure don't want to hurt no one. ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh...

Sorry. A Space Cowboy came riding by. Where were we?

Oh ya...chiming. Ok, Mr. Fish, I'll admit you are right. I kinda maybe sorta have a tendency to once in awhile slightly accidentally innocently sometimes with best intentions chime. When it's not my time. But I sure don't want to hurt no one. ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.

One thing is for sure: no matter what choices my children make, I am no longer in the market for rental children. Mine are keepers and all I want.

________________________ * _________________________

How do you teach or learn decision-making skills? I'm still learning. And would love to learn from you.

Keep swimming and making good choices,
Ms Fish

PS: In the mood for some Steve Miller Band now? Listen to The Joker here.

________________________ * _________________________

WHAT's the DIFFERENCE Update

Warning! Spoiler ahead.

Congratulations to commenter #11 (selected by random.org) JULIE, who emailed me all the correct answers.

Julie said, "Okay. Finally. I want you to know that I spent WAY too long on this and had to enlist the help of my husband and two daughters, ages 4 and 6 to see the differences. Wow. That's just sad"

Well, Julie...it's not sad anymore. You're persistence (and subscription to HIGHLIGHTS magazine) paid off. Watch for your gift card in the mail. And enjoy Olive Garden. When you're there, you're family, ya know. Ciao!

Now, here are the differences from this week's game. And don't forget to come back and play another round on Monday.

Wedding Wednesday: Organization

2011-02-23T02:08:00.033-07:00

Hi friends, it's Wednesday. That means time to talk weddings. So let's get right to it, shall we?

Wedding plans are in full swing

__________________ * ___________________

I'm finding out that things have really changed in the wedding business since I got married in 1987. Okay honestly, I really didn't know anything about the wedding business in 1987, except that you weren't cool unless you had an ice sculpture.

So, my mom let me have an ice sculpture.

Now, today's modern brides aren't cool unless they send a Facebook and Twitter message to watch for a Save-the-Date card, then send a Save-the-Date card to tell people to watch Facebook for when the invitations will arrive, then send an invitation to save the date for the wedding and ask people to reply on Facebook. Follow me? (haha.... twitter....facebook...follow..... I crack myself up!)

Other things to be cool include:

having a personal wedding website, including a wedding registry to donate to starving children in Comoros and to explain how your napkins are really recycled banana peels. Organic peels.
wearing shoes from Manolo Blahnik (which cost as much as an entire 1987 wedding)
having a session with a professional videographer before the wedding day to document the "couple's story" which consists of 101 ways to kiss and holding up love signs in case you thought the video was just a mouthwash commercial.
buying new decorations to look old

Photo credit: The Bride's Cafe

So we aren't gonna be that kind of COOL. But we are going to have a cool wedding.

__________________ * ___________________

We aren't hiring a wedding planner so it is important to be organized and keep good records.

First thing, I made an Excel spreadsheet with 3 tabs: Jobs (or a To-Do List), Budget, and Guest List (including everyone's address). The addresses in Excel will be handy if we don't hand calligraphy the invitations, but print labels directly from the spreadsheet instead.

The Budget sheet lists every cost we expect to incur, including therapy for Mr Fish who can't quite get over that

we won't be having nut cups or an ice sculpture
the reception can't be set up in one hour
the budget requires an Excel spreadsheet.

Shown below is part of my budget sheet. Not shown, is a place for estimated costs and actual costs. This makes it easy to prioritize and allocate the monies. With the use of formulas we have a running total of spent versus remaining funds. I would be happy to share this template with anyone who wants it. Just email me (link at top of page) and I will send it to you.

The next thing I did was buy this wedding planner from B&N. I will gift this to Daisy after the wedding with my notes and receipts in one place. I hope it will be fun to look at over the years and see the costs of things in 2011. Plus, when Daisy is a mother of the bride, it may come in handy. Unless the bride is doing the whole wedding herself, I can attest that they really have no idea how much goes into the planning and execution of a wedding. But the mothers do. Oh do they ever!!

Which is why I made this poster: Don't mess with me I am the mother of the bride!

I had so much fun designing this poster, that I made two more versions.

The Retro Version

The Gangster Version

I'm putting these little posters on the side bar with the HTML code (which totally tested my blogging skillz by the way) so you can grab it and put one on your blog if you are also a MOB.

Feel free to forward these to any mothers you know who are planning a wedding. It's good to help each other. We MOBs have to stick together.

Well, that's all for this week.

Any other organization tips for me?

Lots of love,
Ms Fish

PS: Tune in next week when I unveil THE THEME.
PPS: The Knot is also a great organization resource and one-stop shop. It's the Wal-mart of DIY wedding planning with do-lists, ideas, countdown, free websites for the couple and online shopping.

What's the Difference: Oh my Gosh!!

2011-02-21T03:02:00.014-07:00

Happy {Holiday} Monday!

Guess what that means? Time to play:

What's the Difference? (For background on this game, read here)

This week, all you have to do to win is simply find the differences and leave a comment. On Thursday Feb. 24, at 10 pm MST, a [potential] winner will be randomly selected from the commenters and announced on the blog.

Then the winner will win. When, do you wonder? When will they win? The winner will win when the winner's winning answers are verified to win. Should bring a grin.

Good luck and thanks for playing along.

1. Find FOUR differences between these two photos (not counting the numbers labeled for your convenience). **HINT: look closely at each of the girl's head. Won't be able to see it if viewing this on a mobile phone.

2. When you know the answer, please leave a comment (but don't state the answers). If your name is chosen, I will email you and ask for the answers. If they are correct, you will win a $25 gift card to Olive Garden. If the answers are not correct, then shoot-a-mile, gosh galldarnit. I'll have to pick another winner. Randomly. But that won't happen cuz you are all smartypants.

3. Please do NOT state the ANSWERS in the comment section. (Didn't I already say this?)

FYI: I don't change the lighting between the two photos, so you can be sure that will never be one of the choices. If you see light variances between the two photos, that is probably a function of your computer screen or the tilt of your monitor or a moat in your eye.

Photo credit: Todd Pellowe

Tell me what you think..... was this easy as pie or hard as creme brulee?

Keep swimming and keep sharing great conversation.
Ms. Fish, who sometimes talks in Dr. Seuss speak. When? When the winsome wind spins.

PS: Don't you LOVE this photo? Is anyone besides me dying to know what was said?

Wedding Wednesday

2011-02-17T01:50:00.020-07:00

Her ring is gorgeous. And her glow is genuine.

Still,

I can't quite believe

This!

is happenin'

______________________ * _______________________

A few posts back, I said that big things were happening in the fishbowl. Well, now I can tell you that last Saturday, my dear darling Daisy got engaged.

We are planning a wedding!

I'm still trying to figure out how we got to this point. Daisy just learned to read not too long ago, and started jr. high school last month. Or so it seems. I'm not ready to shop for wedding dresses. I am barely recovered from the trauma of shopping for pageant dresses!

Now in less than 90 days, my grown-up little girl is going to run her own household, decide how often to clean her bathroom, choose her own throw pillows and doormat, and have disagreements about where to squeeze the toothpaste.

I'm feeling a whirlwind of emotions. I don't know whether my tears are more because I'm happy for her or because I'm mourning the loss of her reliance on me and Mr. Fish and the carefree days of being single. She's a smart, mature girl, and I trust her judgment. I always have. I need to hold onto that.

My prayer for her {and all my children} is that they will have a strong marriage full of fun, joy and fights that end with kisses. I pray that they will never experience the sting of divorce, and that their children {and every generation thereafter} will call them blessed and will know and follow God.

In the end, that's what really matters.

______________________ * _______________________

This will be a big DIY wedding, complete with some crazy surprises, if we can pull it off. So every Wednesday, I'll be blogging about the preparations and what I've learned. Or more likely, what I should have learned. That way you can ~~suffer~~ learn right along with me. (See mother. See crazy mother. See crazy mother run. See crazy mother run into a bank. And rob it).

______________________ * _______________________

Keep swimming, and feel free to share tips or advice,

Ms Fish, a self-appointed wedding planner

PS: I would sure appreciate hearing from other mothers. Does anyone out there blog that is as old as me? If so, how did you feel when your daughter(s) got engaged? I certainly had no idea what my mom was going through 27 years ago.

What's the Difference: Lovers

2011-02-14T07:00:00.068-07:00

Feb. 16
**An update from Ms. Fish
This contest is now closed. We didn't reach 14 comments so I learned that what works for the radio, doesn't work for blogs. Bad idea. Because I know that MANY, MANY more than the 12 who left comments played the game. You were just silent lurkers :)

NEXT WEEK, the rules will change again. The winner will be picked randomly from those who leave a comment. If we only have 12 comments again, your odds are good (but the goods won't be odd). And since we didn't have a winner this week...the stakes will be raised. Come on back next Monday and play. And this time, speak up. You'll be glad you did.

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Happy Valentine's Day of Love.

For our game today, we have a pair of lovers with lots to read and no time to do it (hubba, hubba).
Good luck. And thanks for playing along.

Just a reminder about the rules:

1. Find FIVE differences between the two photos (excluding the photo labels).

2. The fourteenth person to email me with the correct answer will win a $20 gift certificate to Olive Garden. Yum! Free food! Free delicious food!

3. In order to claim your prize, you must have also left a comment on the blog. I'll be checking. (Note: the amount of comments and emails I receive may not be equal.... in other words, someone may leave a comment without emailing me. Or vice versa. So don't throw in the [monogrammed pink valentine's] towel if you already see 14 blog comments....)

4. Please do NOT tell the answers in the comment section. Only through email (link on sidebar).

Photo credit: Todd Pellowe

What did you think... too easy, too hard or just right?

Keep swimming and keep loving each other and books.
Ms. Fish

oh wait...a final treat: enjoy this awesomely sweet song in honor of today.

Valentine's Day Dinner

2011-02-11T13:38:00.014-07:00

This morning I woke up with a burning question.

Would it be a slap in love's face, if I don't make my usual nothin' says lovin' like a big hunk of meat and potatoes dinner:

Filet Mignon with Port Wine Demi-Glace and Bleu Cheese Butter
Creamy Cream-Cheese Smashed Potatoes
Grilled Mushrooms
Grilled Seasoned Asparagus

Because here is the deal. This year I really want to make Grilled Cheese Sandwiches.

They can be special. They can be made with fancy cheese. They can still be made with a side of grilled mushrooms (my husband's favorite!).

To complete the meal, I'm thinking a side of French Onion Soup or Homemade Tomato Soup.

Photo credit: Yum Sugar

This and this and this cheese sandwich all sound delicious!!

Creamy smooth melt-in-your mouth hot flavorful cheese can exude romance, especially if you throw in a little asparagus, which affects the pheromones. If you really want to pump up the aphrodisiac properties, add some oysters.

Just for fun, here are a couple of tips when making grilled cheese:
Grate the cheese instead of slice it. Cheese melts faster decreasing the chance of burning the bread.
Use softened, salted butter... browns more evenly and flavors the outside of the bread.
Cover the sandwich when cooking the first side to help melt the cheese sufficiently

What are your favorite ways to make gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches?
What are you making for Valentine's Day Dinner?

Do you think I'm crazy?

Keep swimming and happy planning for your special Valentine.
Ms Fish (who may attempt to make a grilled cheese sandwich that will knock my husband's ~~socks~~ pants off.....unless he's too busy sulking from not getting steak!)

A Collection of Things

2011-02-09T14:19:00.024-07:00

This is an exciting day.

It's my brother's birthday. He's very cool. And he's lucky, because he will never, ever be as OLD as I am. He's a great dad, a competent physician, and a wonderful person. I love him. Tons. Happy birthday Jerms.

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My other brother is doing something absolutely amazing. If you are engaged, or know someone who is, you will kick yourself if you don't check THIS out.

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I saw this poetic tagline on a cooking blog and it cracked me up. Makes you want to stay and read the blog.

Butter my Butt and Call me a Biscuit

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Downton Abbey just became available today on Netflix Instant Viewing.

Have you watched Downton Abbey? If not, do you plan on watching it? If so, what do you think of it? Please do chime in.

What's the Difference: Results

2011-02-08T11:36:00.002-07:00

Good windy morning!

Last night I was reminded ALL night long that I live in Hurricane. Maybe the strong winds will carry in Spring.

Thanks to all who played What's the Difference?

We had a winner at 9:13 pm. Congrats to Justin, an artist with a sharp and creative eye. Several others got it right too.

Now do I tell the answer? Or not so others can still play?

In the trial run I learned a few things. So I am going to do some tweaking. (Did I mention that one of the rules of this game is that I can change the rules?)

Next week, the winner will be the 14th person who emails me with the correct answer (hey...just like being the XXth caller on the radio)!

Fourteen. In honor of V-day. Lovely.

AND here is the catch. (Why is there always a catch?) In order to claim your prize, you must have also left a comment on the blog. I know. That is two things you have to do: email AND comment. But we have traditional values around here at Ms. Fish: you can't expect something for nothing. You are getting a free prize for heaven's sake.

It will be worth it.

If you like money. And you like food.

Hope you'll play along next week.

Photo credit: Jamie Hammond

Keep swimming and let me know if you see hints of Spring.
Ms Fish

What's the Difference?

2011-02-07T16:10:00.029-07:00

It really isn't full-blown Winter anymore. But it's not quite Spring either.

This is my least favorite time of year. Even with the amount of chocolate available.

SO.........

until the tulips bring color to our days, I think it's time for a little game to liven things up. Everyone loves a good game, right?

This game is called

What's The Difference?

(Incidentally, as luck would have it, that's the same question I have about the Superbowl XLV half-time show and the Gong Show.)

Here's how it works: I will post two pictures that look eerily similar. To the untrained eye, that is. If you have a discerning eye for detail and can pick out the most expensive shoes without even seeing the price tag....you will rock this game. Wait a minute. Wrong analogy. Having good taste doesn't have anything to do with the skill needed here.

For this game, your eagle eye needs to find the difference(s) between two pictures.

So here are the rules:

1. Every Monday at 7:00 am M.S.T. (till the tulips bloom), I will post a new photo game.
2.The first person to email me with the correct answer(s) will win a prize. Not like a coupon for CheeseWhiz kind of prize. I'm talking a cool prize.
3. The prizes will vary and will be announced each week, so you will know what you are playing for.
4. Please do NOT state the ANSWERS in the comment section. Play fair, K?

This first week will be a trial run. No prizes...just fun, fun, fun!

The photo below has ONE and only ONE difference between the two (besides the obvious labeling for your convenience). Find the difference and email me (address on sidebar).

*NOTE: The image on the right is slightly larger. That is NOT the difference I'm talking about.

Oh, and please leave a comment below and help me out: was this too easy, too hard or just right!

Keep swimming and keep your chin up till the Spring flush.
Ms Fish

A Little Teaser

2011-02-04T01:01:00.003-07:00

Friday I am heading to Provo to watch Otto swim at the State swim meet. Yeah for him!! And yeah for me for driving four hours to watch a 2 minute race. And yeah for my brother who is letting me stay AGAIN in his spare bedroom. I pretty much almost live with him I go there so much. I really should pay some of his electric bill.

Then when I get back there will be big things to blog about...BIG things are a'brewing here in the fishbowl. And by BIG, I don't mean my recent weight gain.

I'll tell you about it real soon....

CHEERS!

Photo by Todd Pellowe

Keep swimming. I know Otto will.

Ms Fish

The Blogging Highpe

2011-01-27T14:39:00.033-07:00

Unless you are stuck in China without Internet access, you probably know about the mighty aftershocks from this article reverberating through the blogging world.

What a crazy, interesting phenomenon the blogging world has become...so vast, yet so small. It's like the blogging world is one giant set of connected dominoes and when something sets it off.....the rippling cascade affects one after another after another.

So here I am....a little bitty domino in the big line-up, making my own contribution to the pattern. Since the said blog post was published, I have been thinking a lot about this whole blogging issue...

Lots of people have joined the conversation about why Mormon women are such prolific blog writers, and why Mormons AND Non-Mormons read them. And why it strikes such a nerve when those WHYs are analyzed.

Holy smokes...did IT strike a nerve!

So I want to add my five-bits, in true Ms. Fish fashion, about why I think people, including myself, blog. (I'm not going to explore why MORMONS, in particular, create blogs. That has been covered most excellently here and here.)

__________________________ * _________________________

1. The need to write and read blogs is basic: it simply satisfies a primal and universal human need to feel connected, loved, accepted, heard, understood. In the 21st century way.

Blogging is our virtual front porch.

The Porch. Where neighbors gathered in the evening, rocking and sipping iced-tea, and solved the problems of little Johnny. Now our porches sit...deserted and dark, the rocking chair dusty in the wake of soccer games, piano lessons, and corporate dinners. But the problems of little Johnny still need to be solved.

2. Blogging provides a creative avenue for expression. Humans are naturally creative beings. This sets us apart from animals. We desire to draw, paint, dance, take pictures, design, and craft homemade beauty. Writing and/or posting about the latest craft or recipe that I made satisfies an innate creative yearning. Writing and/or crafting is an art form of self-expression, no different than singing or acting. But all of those things require an audience. A performance without an audience is a rehearsal. A rehearsal is a preparatory act... the means to an end, not the end. A great performance or great poetry requires great audiences. Art without an audience is only half finished. So we blog in the hopes that someone, somewhere will read it. And relish our art.

Blogging is our stage.

3. Blogging feeds the tiny [or not so tiny] narcissistic spark in each of us (true...some have gently glowing embers...others are fanning narcissistic flames the size of Florida). Dr. Drew wrote an interesting book in which he proposes that vanity, exhibitionism, entitlement, authority, and superiority among celebrities have been condoned and promoted by the media. "By modeling such behavior for public consumption, the rest of us are mirroring these dangerous traits in our own behavior."

We've become a me, me, me society. Come to my blog, leave me comments, tell me how much you love me and my life and my writing. Follow me on Twitter. Read about my every move on Facebook.

Blogging validates our place in space.

4. Reading blogs satisfies the voyeurism in each of us. We are curious beings. We can't help it. We read People magazine and watch the Bachelor, despite knowing how silly it us and how it won't make us a better person and that we've just been robbed of one or two hours of valuable time never to be recouped. Whatever the underlying motive for reading other blogs....

to escape
to dream
to poke fun
to feel superior
to gawk
to be critical
to empathize
to compare
to idolize
to learn
to be entertained
to feel
to connect
to steal ideas
to support...

....it rises from our curiosity as humans.

Blogging satisfies a human need to peek.

5. Reading blogs / getting comments / Facebook / Twitter / Texting / Email... all provide a small surge of dopamine.....the same "feel-good" substance that is released when taking addictive substances. The rush from social media doesn't come from the message's content, but by simply receiving a message (or comment).

Blogging is a legal, socially acceptable addiction.

Read more about this type of addiction here and here.

__________________________ * _________________________

So yes...some people blog simply to keep a journal. Or to inspire and motivate change in others. Or stay in touch with long-distance relatives. Or make money.

Blogging is simply another medium for being a human being.

Why do you blog?

Keep swimming and keep blogging.

Love,
Ms. Fish

Mandarin Bruschetta with Goat Cheese

2010-12-31T09:44:00.005-07:00

OLIVE the other appetizers you could try tonight may not be as mouth-watering as these little CUTIES. CRUST me, there is nothing like a good bruschetta. Give it a GOAT and let me know how you like it...

Photo credit: Kathy Casey

The flavors of mandarin, calamata olives and fresh basil along with the creaminess of goat cheese all play off each other nicely in this easy entertaining appetizer.

Makes 20 pieces

1 artisanal baguette
extra-virgin olive oil for drizzling
kosher salt as needed
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4 Cuties or mandarin oranges
2 Tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil
3/4 cup chopped vine-ripe tomatoes
1/4 cup chopped fresh basil
2 Tbsp. minced red onion
1 1/2 tsp. finely minced garlic
1/4 cup chopped pitted calamata olives
pinch of red pepper flakes
4 oz. chèvre-style fresh goat cheese (if you aren't a goat cheese fan, try cream cheese)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Cut baguette into 1/4-inch slices—you want about 20 nice-sized pieces. Lay out on a baking sheet. Lightly brush or drizzle bread with olive oil then sprinkle lightly with kosher salt. Bake for about 5–7 minutes, or until toasty. Let crostini cool.

Meanwhile, peel Cuties and dice 1/4 to 1/3-inch. In a medium bowl, toss Cuties with 2 tablespoons olive oil, tomatoes, basil, onion, garlic, olives, and pepper flakes. Set aside.

To serve: Smear each piece of crostini with a heaping teaspoon of goat cheese. Place on a platter and immediately divide the Cuties mixture between the crostini (drain off any excess juice).

Note: Top crostini right before serving so they do not get soft.

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This recipe was made by Kathy Casey at the 2010 BlogHer Food Conference... passed along to me from my brother Justin Hackworth who photographed the event.

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Keep swimming...and blessings for a joyful and prosperous 2011!
Ms. Fish

Fish Finds

2010-12-02T09:26:00.027-07:00

I'm not sure I would ever wear this necklace. Not because I don't like it, but because I rarely wear anything around my neck except hair and hickies. BUT, I think it would look soooo sexy and GREAT on somebody else's neck. It's totally fun, bold, chunky and unique.

Speaking of sexy, I think my little sis should also buy this. Can you say turn heads?

This would be fun to own. Though I'm not yet entirely sure why.....

Anyone going to order this book? Freshly written, you can pre-order it to arrive just in time for Valentine's Day.

Dill pickle flavored products make frequent guest appearances on this blog. I've raved about dill pickle cashews. Now I finally found me some dill pickle potato chips that are 67.9 times better than Lay's. The pickle flavoring is true and subtle. In fact, I'm crunching on one right now in ultimate multitasking style: chewing and typing and moaning.

I found the chips at Wal-Mart. I hate Wal-Mart, and yet I continue to find good stuff there, dang it!
Like these babies below, which I like even more than the chips. My next mission, should I choose to accept it (and I do) is to duplicate these in my own kitchen. I can't afford to keep feeding my addiction.

This Christmas CD is so fun! Especially tracks 1 and 2. We've already worn it out at our Holiday house.

I bought this orange oil at Sur La Table and loooooooove it. That's 8 o's in love! That's some serious lovin'. This oil makes chocolate chip cookies sing with sunshine. It's the secret ingredient in the Bear Country Cookies at the Gateway mall in SLC.

Sometimes, I take the oil out of the cupboard and open it even if I'm not cooking. I just love to smell it. My name is Ms. Fish and I'm addicted to sniffing orange oil. I need help.

Found an excellent recipe for Cinnamon-Sugared Almonds. Daisy made them at Thanksgiving and my mouth hasn't quit watering for more.

Photo Credit: Sugarlaws

With kids in college and friends getting married and being small on space myself, I am digging these stacking kitchen tools.

These boots are as scrumptious as black licorice.

And for the grand finale, feast your eyes on this lovely holiday skirt. Do you ever see things with bling and pockets on the same bolt of fabric? Hardly. Finally a place to put your lip gloss without having to take a purse. That's a deal cincher.

Thanks for coming along on this tour of things I love right now. Happy holiday shopping and eating!

Keep swimming. And keep enjoying lovely things.
Ms. Fish

Twenty Totally Random Thoughts for Tuesday

2010-11-30T13:25:00.011-07:00

I have an email in my Inbox from the inimitable Landon Donovan.
Please do not faint with jealousy. I cannot be held responsible for any blog-reading injuries.
Did you know Landon Donovan was actually named after my son?
Unless of course you actually know who Landon Donovan is...and in your astuteness, you realize he was named 10 years BEFORE my son was even born.
I really hardly ever tell fibs. Truthfully.
Landon is the name for the coolest of cool soccer players. Both Landons I know of are hoping for a 2022 USA Fifa World Cup bid.
Decision Day is only 2 days away. Excitement is building like rolling thunder.
Except that I've never really agreed that thunder rolls, Garth. It crashes.
Hurricane High Basketball season starts tomorrow. I CAN'T WAIT to watch #11 - double toothpicks.
There is no subliminal relationship between thought number eight (crashes) and number nine (HHS basketball). That's why this post is called Random Thoughts.
I ate a 1/2 pound of quality Parmesan cheese in two days. All by myself.
See! That came out of nowhere. Random.
Cyber Monday made no hostage out of me.
I love my sister one million Hot Tamales. I love other people too, but I'm dedicating #14 just to her and hot red candy.
I love my daughter Daisy, who is quite possibly the only other person in the world who shares my passion for cheese and banana bites.
I finally finished the quilt I was making for Daisy. It feels so good to finish something other than a Parmesan cheese wedge.
Thursday will be my final trip to SLC for school. That makes 22 trips in 18 months. My tires have whispered to me how excited they are about not having to drive 600 miles every three weeks.
I don't really talk to tires.
I have been craving this salad lately. It's a Christmas dinner tradition, but I don't think I can wait.
This Sunday (Dec. 5) is our annual Christmas Sing-A-Long and Cookie Exchange. Are you coming?

T-shirt Memory Quilt for Daisy. Every square tells a story!

Keep swimming,
Ms Fish

Awesome

2010-11-29T23:46:00.005-07:00

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What or Who do you think is AWESOME?

Keep swimming, and keep being awesome.
Ms. Fish

Social Media Wordle

2010-11-18T18:06:00.000-07:00

This is a Wordle I made from my Delicious bookmarks. Can you guess the subject of my doctoral project?

Keep swimming,
Ms Fish

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You can try out your own Wordle here.

Why I Got a Doctorate Degree

2010-11-16T16:35:00.003-07:00

My awesome brother wrote a really great post today on why he takes pictures. I loved it for many reasons. One: he's a GREAT storyteller. And another, he is wise. And another, his chosen profession has so much meaning and value, and helps both him and his clients really focus on what is the most important thing in our lives + leave such a lasting legacy. I'm so proud of him.

It got me thinking about what I do. So I decided to write a response post on Why I Got a Doctorate Degree.

It can be summed up in four words:

I have no idea.

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Now ask me in three weeks when I've graduated or in 3 months when I hopefully have a job. There is a statistically good chance that I'll have a different answer.

Keep swimming and keep learning.
Ms. Fish

Layered Salad

2010-11-10T13:38:00.002-07:00

This is one of my all-time favorite salads. Don't be turned off by the simple Mayo dressing. After it sits overnight in the fridge, it totally transforms into something delicious. Dumbledore would be proud.

You can find a lot of variants on the Internet. Here is the version I make over and over:

1 head lettuce, chopped
1/2 cup parmesan cheese, finely grated
1 cup celery, chopped
1/4 tsp garlic
1/2 cup green onions, sliced
1 T sugar
1 can sliced water chesnuts
1 pkg bacon, cooked and crumbled
1 pkg frozen peas
2-3 boiled eggs, sliced
1 cup mayonnaise

Place chopped lettuce in large bowl (it's pretty in a glass bowl). Layer celery, onions, water chestnuts, and peas. Spread mayo over top. Mix together parmesan cheese, garlic and sugar. Sprinkle on top of salad and let stand overnight in fridge. Next day, top with bacon and boiled eggs just before serving.

Photo credit: My Favorite Recipes. This salad is a little different than the way I do it.

Living Grateful

2010-11-04T23:06:00.007-06:00

Welcome to November: the month of gratitude. I love this time of year when we pause to reflect on all the things in our lives for which we are grateful. It's like getting a little pre-load of oxygen before the December shortness of breath.

Two years ago, every day in November, I blogged about something I was especially grateful for. It was great fun. This year, I'm in the middle of my dissertation, so I don't have time for anything that time consuming. But I still like to reflect, so I compiled all those earlier gratitude posts and put them into one handy location under the tab Living Grateful.

What are YOU grateful for?

Keep swimming,

Ms. Fish

In Honor of Elections

2010-11-04T22:28:00.000-06:00

In honor of the mid-term elections this week, I am reminded of this.

Please God.... Bless our Nation.

Murder Mystery Dinner Party + Halloween Ideas

2010-11-01T18:45:00.011-06:00

It was a night of bribery, stealing, murder and lying....pretty much everything we've taught our kids not to do.

That's what happened at the Immortals Annual Costume Ball. My son was murdered...by his very own brother. But just like in the movies, my son came back to life, and the two brothers kissed and made up. Well, they made up anyway.

Now, let's take a tour....

This is the outside of the house by day

and by night....

welcome into the entryway....

take a peek into the living room...

enter the living room...

where the fireplace is alight...

and a black cat waits to pounce

Look over to the kitchen....

and see the Table of Evidence

the food is ready

spiderweb eggs

brains with a lethal tumor

who doesn't love cookies and worms?

fingers

deadly morsels

bubbling brew

now the guests arrive

and the mayhem began.

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Party details

DECORATIONS
Window posters: here and here
Goblets: Spirit Halloween store
Leather bound classic books: Wal-Mart
Chalkboard with Edgar Allen Poe Poem: black foam core / white chalk
Mice and Black ravens: Martha Stewart
Bats: hand-drawn and hand-cut
Glass candy jars: Tai Pan Trading
Candy Jar Labels: Martha Stewart
Brain Jello Mold
Black cat: Tai Pan Trading

MENU
Chili
Breadsticks
Spider web eggs
Bloody fingers
Pumpkin Spice Donut Holes
Guacamoldy with Bat Tortilla Chips
Spider cupcakes
Crudites with Buttermilk Herb Dip

MURDER MYSTERY
Dinner and Murder Mystery Party Games

Keep swimming, and if you are going to smoke, do it with candy cigs.
Ms Fish

Grumpy Pants

2010-10-24T22:38:00.001-06:00

WINNING.... isn't everything.

Keep swimming,
Ms Fish