The other night my daughter came home from being with a group of girls and sprawled herself out over my bed. I love it when Daisy sprawls. It means we are in for some serious girl talk. Then the sprawling was followed by deep sighs which meant we were in for the kind of girl talk where my gills get all ruffled. And ruffled they did. What I heard could have been a trailer from the movie Mean Girls.
So herein lies my great parenting dilemma: How do I help my teen-age daughter swim among the sharks without becoming a piranha?
And how do I hurt the 'mean girls' and make them pay?
As we talked, once again, my daughter taught me a great lesson because she understands the bigger picture (that she would rather be called a 'slut' than have a mom in jail). I was amazed by her attitude. She harbors no ill-will against her supposed "friends." Daisy recognizes that gossip is an inescapable part of adolescence, and simply a way to cope with insecurities. It is a girl's way of publicly announcing her jealousy. Gossip serves a very useful function by revealing the true character of the gossiper and helps to sort the wheat from the chaff.
Ok...Daisy didn't come right out and say all that directly....but that's exactly what she meant when she pleaded:
"mom, do NOT call the girl's parents!"
So I guess it's time to be honest here. The real issue is this: how does my daughter swim among the sharks and keep ME from becoming a piranha?
2 comments:
Jenni, well,maybe YOU can't call the girl's parents, but I WILL! This broke my heart...girls are so mean sometimes. But, her days are numbered in that high school. I'm so very very sorry. It's truly amazing how this cycle still goes on and on.
Dang. I'm scared.
This much I can say: IF my kid was gossiping and calling some other girl a slut, I would want to know about it and put the smackdown on that crap. Best of luck!
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