Grease! And I'm not talking about the movie.
They all saw it coming and shook their head in dismay. "Why?" they asked, "when things had been going so well?" There was nothing they could do about it. The onslaught was inevitable because it was New Year's Eve. And so, both the large and microvasculature housed within the Fisher bodies prepared for the barrage of saturated carbon chains which were soon to enter their world.
Now, since I am trying to be culturally food sensitive, I must warn you: IF you are squeamish around fried foods, or you are a cardiologist, do not read on. What follows is a harrowing tale of nightmarish fare for individuals who are health conscious or who are popping STATINS or other lipid-lowering agents like they are Smarties.
And for the rest of us, read on because you might enjoy hearing about our fat last supper of 2008. Our dinner consisted of homemade french fries, onion straws, scones and marinated Filet Mignon finger steaks: all fried to golden perfection in something other than water. Now before you keel over with an elevated LDL just by reading this, I will say that we at least used Canola oil. That cancels out some of the badness. Added to those foods were embellishments of fry sauce and creamy honey butter! Then we topped it off with sweet creamy orange rolls!
We have this meal once a year and call it...prepare to be wowed by originality.......
"GREASY DINNER!" And it is sooooo good! You see having this serves two purposes: 1) Makes us shiver with delight as we [onion] ring in the New Year! 2) Makes us feel like we will be eating so healthy in the New Year because we certainly couldn't get any worse.
Janessa's great friend, Celeste, joined us in our greasy indulgence as well as the rest of the evening's festivities. You can read what she had to say about it here. It was really great to have her with us and hope that next time we have something healthy like tofu and eggplant she will be here to witness it. Come to think of it, I hope I'll be around to witness it!
If you would like to make a New Year's Resolution to taste the most delicious onion straws ever - I'm talking better than the Bloomin' Onion - give this recipe a whirl! Then take your little tushy for a whirl!
Onion Straws Delicioso
Begin by slicing one large onion very thinly. Separate the onion slices into rings and place them into baking dish such as a 9 x 13 glass pan. Measure 2 cups buttermilk (or you can make your own buttermilk by adding a couple tablespoons of white vinegar to just under 2 cups of milk). Pour over the onions. Press the onions down so that they’re as submerged as possible. Let them soak for at least one hour.
Next in bowl, mix:
2 cups flour
a little less than 1 Tbls salt (don't worry if this seems like a lot of salt. It is! Accept it and move on!)
pepper to taste - don't be shy
1/4 - 1/2 tsp cayenne
Pour 2 quarts canola oil into deep dutch oven or deep-fat fryer. Heat oil to 375.
With tongs (or your fingers if no one is watching), remove a handful of onions from the buttermilk and place into the flour mixture. Lift the rings and give ‘em a quick tap on the side of the bowl, just to shake off the excess.
Can you almost taste them? I'm drooling just typing this...
Grab a handful of onions and drop them into the hot oil. With a spoon, break them up. Fry until a beautiful golden brown. Repeat the process until all the onions are cooked.
Then make a second batch to share with everyone else, because by the time they are all cooked, you might have eaten them all gone!
Now I can be content, knowing that I started the New Year off right by sharing something that will most definitely make tastebuds happy. And cause massive amounts of salivating. Heck, I might even be flooded with thank you notes and job offers!